twasterd

straight up fucking wasted

shiieett nukka I'm fuggn twasterd like a mofucka

yo dude, im so twasterd I cud be a nigga

sippin patron all night like that got me twasterd as hell

twasterd by gel&kate September 9, 2010

twatterdnipplewaffle 

A person who meets one or more of the following qualifications:

a) Insufferably annoying person whose personality is more like a terdsicle but whose actions scream twatwaffle and make you want to punch them in the chest. Or nipple area.

b) an individual who resembles a chipmunk and behaves in an extremely socially awkward way; or

c) someone prone to posting faux-modelesque pictures on social media sites, usually posing with a stuffed toy, dorm furniture or a cell-phone-in-the-mirror shot.

Angie is SUCH a twatterdnipplewaffle, she insists on re-tweeting everything I post on facebook with the words "lolz" next to it.

or

Did you see the latest picture Angie posted on her "modeling" website? The one with the picture of her looking like a chipmunk with her favorite eeyore toy? What a twatterdnipplewaffle.

twatterdnipplewaffle by The Trojan Horsie January 29, 2012

Twastard

A cunning mixture between Bastard and Twat, used when someone is bad enough to be both at the same time. Also as it is not technically a swear word, no one should have any objections with you shouting at them!

Invented by Eve and Dunnie (well more eve!)

"OMG You are such a TWASTARD!"

Twastard by Dunnie September 29, 2005

twasted

1. When one is competely and utterly FUCKED by any form of alcoholic beverage.

Also an Australian term meaning dope or sick.

Shit, last night I got twasted and fucked my own grandma.

Damn cracka, that sex was twasted

twasted by Nick March 26, 2005

twastard

1. Cross between a twat and a bastard.

2. Twice a bastard.

Origin - first coined in 1977 in supermarket warehouse in Lancashire, England.

Tony Blair is a useless twastard.

twastard by Dibber April 11, 2005

Twaster 

Time Waster.

Customers that come in that never buy anything they just want to talk.

People who have all day to do nothing when you have 101 things to do.

Someone who spends more time talking about doing something then actually getting it started.

Bad or painful foreplay

Best used in Retail:
Customer: Yeah... I was thinking about buy a computer, but since I have been laid off its been.... bla bla bla bla yackety smackety bla bla (30 mins later) and my son is a computer expert that work for the military and he went to college for all this but bla bla bla

Sale guy #2: Dude! He was a total twaster!

Sale Guy #1: Yeah I could have made three sales by the time he was was done telling me he didn't really need anything he was just out an about.
-----------------
Guy: You like that?
Girl: Uhmm it feels good daddy (bored look on her face)
Guy: I am gonna do this to you all night.

Next day on the phone with girlfriend...
Girl: Gurrrrl he was nothing but a twaster. I could have stayed at home and done better by myself.

Twaster by askme1 August 10, 2014

Twasted

To be extremely drunk. Short for "totally wasted"

"I was twasted last night after 7 glasses of wine at the graduation party."

Twasted by BahamaMama June 22, 2006