"Hey Rich, wanna bar out?"
"Yeah man, lets get f*cked up tonight!"

"I'm geeked up and I cant see and all the walls keep lookin at me

I tell myself theres nothin wrong but I cant stop grittin my teeth

I cant eat I cant sleep I just geek I just geek"

The cases taken up by the Hipster Defense League over the past several years have been mainly pro boner work.

When I asked the hooker to piss on me she said it would be $50 extra for a Golden Donald.

Don't mess with him, he a clout chaser"

I won't see her for a month. It's a good thing she's comfortable with robocoitus.

John: What are you doing on Tinder, Jason, I thought you had a girlfriend?
Jason: Yeah dude, but she’s been pissing me off today, im just cooling off with some rageswiping.
John: I gotcha man, we’ve all been there.