If an alcoholic just doesn't have that first next one, they are on the right track. That first one is the killer.

This Jazz Cabbage got me zooted. Jazz Cabbage is less harmful than Squares. I’m smoking that Jazz Cabbage boy.

"Man, my head hurts. I must have had a blast last night. Ah, crap! I have to be at work in 30 min. I'll just grab 2 long-necks and be on my way!" This is a true Alcoholic.

That motherfucker was drinking a keystone in the shower. That motherfucker is an alcoholic.

"I just woke up, how can I already be two drinks behind?"

or

"Alcoholic? What's that?"

E.g., In January, 2007, Lindsay Lohan told People magazine "I haven't had a drink in seven days. Or anything." Lindsay Lohan's publicist Leslie Zelnick confirmed to The Associated Press in December that Lohan was attending Alcoholics Anonymous meetings.

Bills wife was getting ready to go down on him, but Bill said no, I'll take a double jack n coke instead.