To do something that only serves your selfish needs and does not do anything with regards for anyone else nor does it advance your group forward. Not to mention your self-indulgent actions just leave a hot and sticky mess.

The majority of Arab leaders only seem to be able to hamasturbate. They pleasure themselves at the expense of their people and their people's future.

Hamasturbate by Snarcitz November 24, 2012

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hesturbate

twiddle the bean or jack in an unusual manner, with thoughts of doing something particularly dirty that is not always associated with sex. Masturbation that is a mixture of very perverted and very funny. Often punctuated by Ha! This word has become popular on porn boards, and is derived from Hester, wearer of the scarlet letter.

"I imagined you shoving that evian bottle in your cooch, and I had to go hesturbate"

hesturbate by Olivia Yearns November 10, 2008

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hasturbate

to masturbate while under the hallucinogenic effect of opioids

Dude 1: that new VR porn is so realistic! It took me to all kinds of places besides the bedroom.
I remember surfing the pacific, wrestling some hobos, going down on Danny Devito and punching a puma!
Dude 2: umm I was using the VR headset last night....
Dude 1: Oh...I may have just done a whole heap of heroin instead
Dude 2: .....
Danny Devito: next time you hasturbate fella leave me out of it!
Dude 2: bet he didn't complain last night! (high fives dude 1)

hasturbate by GozUnlimited July 27, 2016

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Hatesturbating

The act of thinking angry thoughts in order to get oneself in a rage.

Dude, calm down and stop hatesturbating.

Hatesturbating by Phaex February 17, 2009

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hairsturbate

when one touches their hair excessively and so tenderly and lovingly it almost resembles masturbation. Teenage girls constantly hairsturbate, being as they are completely obsessed with how their hair looks ALL OF THE TIME.

*Morgan keeps touching her hair in the hallway at school*
Morgan: I straightened my hair this morning, does it look alright *grabs and tucks behind ears, messes up then combs through with fingers.*
Olivia: It looks fine.
Morgan: Really? I thought it looked away, maybe if i wore it like this...
Olivia: Bye! *walks away quickly to Jenna*
Jenna: What's with Morgan touching her hair?
Olivia: I'm not sure, but i don't think i can stand to watch her hairsturbate for much longer.

hairsturbate by ding dong debra February 7, 2009

trucker's tan

A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.

I had a trucker's tan after driving for 10 straight hours on a sunny day.

trucker's tan by population361 May 30, 2006

Word of the Day on October 5, 2026

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kidulting

The phenomenon where adults salivate at children's toys

Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!

kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025

Word of the Day on October 4, 2026

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Boffin

British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”

Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.

According to the boffins downstairs, the murderer used a serrated blade.

Boffin by Agnon February 11, 2023

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Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.

I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.

Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026

Word of the Day on October 2, 2026