Improvident
"Therefore every improvident step will meet with terrible revenge."-The Story of the Great War, Volume II (of VIII)
Improvident by lonesomedragon September 23, 2018
Words you can keep
Lowe's Home Improvement
The epitome of ass-kissery. As soon as you walk into a Lowe's, your ass saturated with the spit of every employee that crosses your path; but it is not their fault, because it is what they have been constantly told to do every day. Lowe's is built upon the model of "excellent, excruciatingly-paranoid, money-pinching, annoying, ass-kissing, customer-focus". The best thing to do when you see a "red vest" is to cut a corner and run. These people are already stressed enough with the dumbass questions that get flung at them every day so one more question is just one more reason for them to eat a bullet.
Customer walks in Lowe's:
"HI! BILLY MAYS HERE WITH Lowe's Home Improvement WAREHOUSE! WE HAVE LOTS OF ITEMS TO HELP YOUR EVERY NEED FOR EVERY SITUATION! HOW MAY WE BE OF SERVICE TO YOU TODAY SIR OR MA'AM???"
Customer: Holy fucking ass crackers! Can I not look at the fucking power tools without being bombarded by damn service? Fuck this I'm going to Home Depot where people leave me the hell alone!
"HI! BILLY MAYS HERE WITH Lowe's Home Improvement WAREHOUSE! WE HAVE LOTS OF ITEMS TO HELP YOUR EVERY NEED FOR EVERY SITUATION! HOW MAY WE BE OF SERVICE TO YOU TODAY SIR OR MA'AM???"
Customer: Holy fucking ass crackers! Can I not look at the fucking power tools without being bombarded by damn service? Fuck this I'm going to Home Depot where people leave me the hell alone!
Lowe's Home Improvement by yourmomlovesmyjohnson09 December 12, 2010
Home Improvement
An ABC sitcom airing from 1991-1999 and one of the most cleverly written sitcoms of the decade. Comedian Tim Allen starred as Tim Taylor, a chauvinist, handyman husband and father of three mischeivous sons who hosted a Detroit cable tool show called Tool Time, and just could help himself to giving "more power" to machinery. Much of the show also focused on the of the rest of the Taylor family: Tim’s wife Jill is a feminist and aspiring psychologist, the loner and very astute neighbor Wilson Wilson always provides advice for Tim, and Tim’s sons are mischeivious but good kids. Tim is very masculine and chauvinist (he even gets disgusted at just the thought of going to the opera), a handyman, clumsy, loved to make jokes about Al’s flannel shirts and overweight mother, always rewiring gadgets, was always competing with his next door neighbor Doc Johnson for the neighborhood’s best Christmas lights, seeking advice from his other neighbor Wilson Wilson (Wilson Wilson is not a typo)
Spoofs from the show:
1. Tim’s frequent jokes about Al’s flannel shirst and overweight mom.
2. always seeking advice from his next door neighbor Wilson Wilson, only to screw it up
3. Wilson’s face is always hidden
4. always rewiring things to give it “more power”…only to have it explode
5. his wife Jill can’t cook
6. Tim has an obsession with Sears
7. always competes with Doc Johnson, a 80-year old retired proctologist, for the neighborhood’s best Christmas lights
8. Tim is so clumsy that he dropped a steel beam on his wife’s car, fell though a portapotty, glued his head to a table, had a hammer frozen to his tongue, fell through the roof on a project house, blew up a friend’s house and blew up the dishwasher
9. always building a hot rod in the garage
10. frequently grunts when exited or perplexed
11. Bob Villa is his biggest competition
12. Tim often hits his head on a basement pipe above the stairs
13. frequently made jokes about his mother-in-law “Nanna’s” weight but stopped when he saw how thin she had become
14. Always wants Tool Time to take a commercial break when he gets injured
15. Tim frequently gets sick eating Polish food from "Stan’s" Polish restaurant in Hamtramk
16. Tim is well-known at the emergency room, even to the point of having his own cup labeled “Tim”
17. Tim often wears sweatshirts from a Michigan college.
18. Tim's three sons' are always bullied by Vinny McGern
Spoofs from the show:
1. Tim’s frequent jokes about Al’s flannel shirst and overweight mom.
2. always seeking advice from his next door neighbor Wilson Wilson, only to screw it up
3. Wilson’s face is always hidden
4. always rewiring things to give it “more power”…only to have it explode
5. his wife Jill can’t cook
6. Tim has an obsession with Sears
7. always competes with Doc Johnson, a 80-year old retired proctologist, for the neighborhood’s best Christmas lights
8. Tim is so clumsy that he dropped a steel beam on his wife’s car, fell though a portapotty, glued his head to a table, had a hammer frozen to his tongue, fell through the roof on a project house, blew up a friend’s house and blew up the dishwasher
9. always building a hot rod in the garage
10. frequently grunts when exited or perplexed
11. Bob Villa is his biggest competition
12. Tim often hits his head on a basement pipe above the stairs
13. frequently made jokes about his mother-in-law “Nanna’s” weight but stopped when he saw how thin she had become
14. Always wants Tool Time to take a commercial break when he gets injured
15. Tim frequently gets sick eating Polish food from "Stan’s" Polish restaurant in Hamtramk
16. Tim is well-known at the emergency room, even to the point of having his own cup labeled “Tim”
17. Tim often wears sweatshirts from a Michigan college.
18. Tim's three sons' are always bullied by Vinny McGern
Home Improvement by krock1dk@yahoo.com January 26, 2008
Home Improvement
Home Improvement by Meijer's! December 5, 2005
improvment deterioration
Used for when people try to improve something but actually make it worse overall.
This is translated from the original German word : Verschlimmbesserung
This is translated from the original German word : Verschlimmbesserung
improvment deterioration by FaZe Optic Jevshot January 21, 2021
Self improvement
Hym "I'm not willing to do the self improvement thing for free anymore. I'm going to need some goth booty. Or some kind of booty equivalent. Like, some asmrtist booty or maybe some hispanic cleaning lady booty. But I don't know. I just... How about this: For every 1 booty of this 👆 caliber I receive, I will do 1000 push ups before collecting any subsequent booty. How does that sound? .... On second thought, 500 push ups. I'm thinking like 100 a day and I'm just not going to wait 10 days for subsequent booty. So, 500 per booty and the genius money factory will get in shape."
Self improvement by Hym Iam February 18, 2023
self-improvement
self-improvement by dip June 29, 2004
More from Urban Dictionary
Salad Days
green inexperienced youthful judgement and cold blooded execution of those judgements.
Rashness with little concern of consequence.
Antony and Cleopatra. William Shakespeare
"My salad days,
When I was green in judgment, cold in blood."
- William Shakespeare, Antony and Cleopatra, 1.5
Rashness with little concern of consequence.
Antony and Cleopatra. William Shakespeare
"My salad days,
When I was green in judgment, cold in blood."
- William Shakespeare, Antony and Cleopatra, 1.5
Salad Days by GilbyRFC0 October 7, 2011
Word of the Day on August 28, 2026
age gate
An absolutely foolproof way to keep minors from viewing content deemed "too mature" for them to watch.
board chow
A)
The Crud that collects under the keys in a keyboard. Usually more severe in the keyboards of programmers and webmasters as they tend to spend a lot of time at the the computer and thus eat at their desk. Mainly affecting IBM Model M (clicly) style boards.
B)
Can also be used to gross out Non-Techie people
The Crud that collects under the keys in a keyboard. Usually more severe in the keyboards of programmers and webmasters as they tend to spend a lot of time at the the computer and thus eat at their desk. Mainly affecting IBM Model M (clicly) style boards.
B)
Can also be used to gross out Non-Techie people
A)
Bill: want to go to the club?
Bob: No, I've got to clean out my board chow, keys are starting to stick.
B)
Bill: Want to go out to get a bite?
Bob: No, i am just going to have some of my board chow/
Bill: Whats' that?
Bob: The food scraps that collect in my keyboard; Want some?
Bill: *GAG* *HURL* *GAG*
Bill: want to go to the club?
Bob: No, I've got to clean out my board chow, keys are starting to stick.
B)
Bill: Want to go out to get a bite?
Bob: No, i am just going to have some of my board chow/
Bill: Whats' that?
Bob: The food scraps that collect in my keyboard; Want some?
Bill: *GAG* *HURL* *GAG*
board chow by BinaryHackerMan September 3, 2007
Word of the Day on August 26, 2026
grebo
West Midlands slang word for rockers, bikers, greasers etc. In the late 1980s it was used by the UK music press to refer to a specific scene centered around the bands Pop Will Eat Itself and Crazyhead. The term never found favour with readers of 'the inkies' (Sounds, Melody Maker and the still extant NME) and was soon dropped. Now often used in predominantly working-class areas of the midlands and the north to mean someone who listens to rock-derived music and/or dresses in a manner that suggests they affiliate themselves with rock music of some kind.
TikTok Farlands
TikTok Farlands is a term to refer to videos that you see after scrolling for a long time. These videos can potentially be disturbing, or weird. Said videos can also have low likes, or low comments.
TikTok Farlands by PINES FAMILY TORTURER July 24, 2026
Word of the Day on August 23, 2026