Jonesyed 

When someone doesn’t like you but they use you for a lift because it’ll be free

Joanne: we had no money for a taxi so we asked him for a free lift

Amy: oh so you jonesyed him

Jonesyed by ol’ dirty bastard March 14, 2018

Phil Jonesed 

someone is Phil Jonesed when a girl/guy makes them strip with the intention to have sex but then changes his/her mind and not have sex with them, resulting in them putting their clothes back on in failure and shame.

a reference to Manchester United player Phil Jones who took his shirt off in celebration before Sergio Aguero's late league winning goal during the 2011/2012 BPL season

john: did you get lucky with Sasha?

tom: no she came over, we made out then she stopped and left after i got naked

john: you got Phil Jonesed

Phil Jonesed by ThatDude1988 July 12, 2012

Jonesed 

Verb.

To perform poorly. To screw-up.

Dude...I f****n jonesed that mid-term.

Jonesed by JBG1234567 October 19, 2010

Jonesied 

A term that describes the mental and/or physical paralysis of an individual after consuming marijuana.

“Want another toke mate?”
“No chance mate I’m absolutely jonesied”

Jonesied by Dankmems69 October 18, 2018

Mr Jonesed 

To be caught with child pornography, or to be caught having been involved in sexual acts with someone under theage of consent. Can also be used as a derogetary term to imply someone is a paedophile when in fact they aren't

"Did you hear that old man down the street was Mr Jonesed? knew something was up with him..."

Mr Jonesed by Uzumaki Mitch June 17, 2006

joneseyed 

the act of getting incredibly high on any drug known to man, the act of getting joneseyed is normally followed by one of the following; sexual encounters, black outs, gang fights, weird injuries, intoxicated phone calls, or death. this word is derived from the man known as c. jones, who partakes in these activities every day of his life.

"yo we gon' get joneseyed tonight"-50 cent
"hell yeah c jones is supplying"-lloyd banks

joneseyed by cjonesfan1 March 7, 2007

get Alex Jonesed 

When someone loses access to their accounts on multiple online services, as punishment for violating no rules on one of the services, as though by conspiracy.

"Mister Metokur's Facebook page is down?"
"Yeah, after he got his second YouTube strike, they counted it as three strikes, and then he started to get Alex Jonesed."

get Alex Jonesed by DiscoKrakken August 28, 2018