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cocknitive 

Hyper awareness of the male genitalia in social settings.
Today, I was very cocknitive in the gym.
cocknitive by Charles A Churchill September 12, 2013

Cocknotist

When a well endowed man swings his cack back and forth in front of a woman like a pendulum until she goes into a deep sleep. Once the woman is fully emotionally and physicality paralyzed the man shoots his gravy on her forehead.

Note* The Cocknotist is a wonderful one-night-stand technique. The woman will never remember what happened the night before, and the man may have free reign over a wondrous body. It is cheaper, more effective, and completely legal compared to its counterpart, roofies.
I was peeing in the guy's bathroom when the lady janitor was cleaning and I decided I wanted some action. I gave her the cocknotist and fucked her like a banshee in the 3rd stall, the one with all the profanity and cacks, then I left her there to be found only by her boss and to make matters worse, be fired the next day.

Cockritis 

An inability to expel nut. Leads to damage to the tubes of the urogenital tract. Can lead to severe hypertension and inflammation of the cock. Causes discolorations, ranging from yellow to green. Originates deep in the dick. BAD
Hey bro, I just went to the Doctor and he says if I don't get this nut out soon I'm gonna get stage 5 acute cockritis.
Cockritis by maxsquared56 May 31, 2018

cocknitive dissonance

1. When a man really wants to have sex with a woman but knows he shouldn't because she's involved, too crazy, related, etc.

2. When you have a kink that turns you on but at the same time would not like to explore it

3. When a man is gay but is having trouble admitting it due to societal norms, pressure from parents, etc. (Go for it, dude! It's okay!)
1. If my sister looked like Scarlett Johansson, I would be experiencing some serious cocknitive dissonance.

2. It's a fantasy of mine to have sex in public, but I don't want to get arrested; it's giving me serious cocknitive dissonance.

3. I seriously doubt that they're a couple; if they are, she's blind because he's clearly experiencing profound cocknitive dissonance.

Cockitis 

n. Flu-like symptoms in which the throat is inflamed usually because of residue semen caught in the sarcophagus. The term finds roots from "cock" a vulgar term for penis and "itis" a suffix usually added to illnesses with symptoms of inflammation.
John: "where is Charlie today?"
David: "Sick at home, has a sore throat."
John: "Must be cockitis"
Cockitis by TheEmpoleon May 24, 2010

Covanitis 

A medical condition in which a person plays so much halo that they forget to come to work/school. Common symptoms include twitchy thumbs and pale skin.
Covanitis affected many people this past Tuesday, when Halo 3 was released.
Covanitis by Colidis Columpis October 13, 2007
More from Urban Dictionary

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
When your wife’s boyfriend let you sleep past 8pm 😎😎
Wife’s boyfriend: You have 5 more minutes
Me: Poggers!
Poggers by Just_Charles April 14, 2020
Word of the Day on October 26, 2026

Oblication 

A vacation, feeling more like an obligation, that involves visiting or staying with family.
So Joe where are you taking the kids for spring break vacation? We are going on an oblication to Boca to visit my mother-in-law.
Oblication by kimmerr May 5, 2011
Word of the Day on October 25, 2026

Surf Dracula Syndrome 

A phenomenon in film/television series, most notably streaming series, where the main premise is drawn out to such a point that it takes an entire season or more to get the parts of the series the audience is actually interested in seeing.

For example, if a series is titled "Surf Dracula," a majority of viewers would tune in expecting to see Dracula surfing by the first or second episode. However, the entire first season would instead be tedious padding and backstory before finally ending with Dracula surfing in the last five minutes of the season finale.
I watched "Smallville" on Netflix the other day. Dude, it was ten seasons of filler before he finally flew! Major Surf Dracula Syndrome!
Word of the Day on October 24, 2026
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