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Cockritis 

An inability to expel nut. Leads to damage to the tubes of the urogenital tract. Can lead to severe hypertension and inflammation of the cock. Causes discolorations, ranging from yellow to green. Originates deep in the dick. BAD
Hey bro, I just went to the Doctor and he says if I don't get this nut out soon I'm gonna get stage 5 acute cockritis.
Cockritis by maxsquared56 May 31, 2018
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cocknitive 

Hyper awareness of the male genitalia in social settings.
Today, I was very cocknitive in the gym.
cocknitive by Charles A Churchill September 12, 2013

Cocknotist

When a well endowed man swings his cack back and forth in front of a woman like a pendulum until she goes into a deep sleep. Once the woman is fully emotionally and physicality paralyzed the man shoots his gravy on her forehead.

Note* The Cocknotist is a wonderful one-night-stand technique. The woman will never remember what happened the night before, and the man may have free reign over a wondrous body. It is cheaper, more effective, and completely legal compared to its counterpart, roofies.
I was peeing in the guy's bathroom when the lady janitor was cleaning and I decided I wanted some action. I gave her the cocknotist and fucked her like a banshee in the 3rd stall, the one with all the profanity and cacks, then I left her there to be found only by her boss and to make matters worse, be fired the next day.

cockbiting fucktard 

1. The Red team in Red Vs Blue.

2. The act of biting cocks while being a fucking retard.
Tex: Great. You broke my voice filter you cockbiting fucktards.

cockriding 

Favouring a higher authority so they'll favour you.
Low rank: You're looking amazing today!
High rank: Thank you!

Somebody else: That low rank is always cockriding a high rank.
cockriding by LoserPopculture February 25, 2020

Cockregister 

A person who has a lot of cock in them all the time. Like a cash register has money, a Cockregister has cock, or penis, dick, one eyed yogurt slinger, wang, tube steak, or a big fat tan juicy happy.
Taylor: "...You're a dick weed motherfucker, you fagget, Jesus!"
Chris: "Fuck you, you... COCKREGISTER!!!"
Taylor: "What the fuck does that mean?"
Cockregister by Chris_despises_Taylor December 31, 2008

cocknitive dissonance

1. When a man really wants to have sex with a woman but knows he shouldn't because she's involved, too crazy, related, etc.

2. When you have a kink that turns you on but at the same time would not like to explore it

3. When a man is gay but is having trouble admitting it due to societal norms, pressure from parents, etc. (Go for it, dude! It's okay!)
1. If my sister looked like Scarlett Johansson, I would be experiencing some serious cocknitive dissonance.

2. It's a fantasy of mine to have sex in public, but I don't want to get arrested; it's giving me serious cocknitive dissonance.

3. I seriously doubt that they're a couple; if they are, she's blind because he's clearly experiencing profound cocknitive dissonance.
More from Urban Dictionary

Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.
Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026
Word of the Day on October 2, 2026
Literally "dirty" pronounced with a West Indian accent. Can also have a positive connotation, for example Sean Paul's album title "Dutty Rock".
"The girl is pretty but she corrupt and dutty!"

or, in a positive usage:

"Booya! That freestyle was dutty!"
Dutty by J Hall April 3, 2003
Word of the Day on October 1, 2026
korean word for madam, older woman
Ajumma wait a moment
Ajumma by aintnotinbutnice July 5, 2009
Word of the Day on September 30, 2026

Slop Grenade

When someone uses AI to generate a large document, slide deck, or piece of code/software and tosses it over the fence for you to deal with.
Chad: Hey Brent I sent you the new backend API change to review, it’s only 100 files changed.

Brent: he just tossed me a slop grenade
Slop Grenade by Joe Squid September 28, 2026
Word of the Day on September 29, 2026
Short-hand for the word floccinaucinihilipilification, meaning the estimation of something as valueless (encountered mainly as an example of one of the longest words in the English language).
After we broke up, he was floxi to me.
floxi by Dr. Geek May 13, 2009
Word of the Day on September 28, 2026
NYC people who migrate north to Quahog, RI to see the leaves in the fall.
New York and everyone from there can fornicate themselves with an iron stick.
leafers by ss++ February 8, 2005
Word of the Day on September 27, 2026
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