winemom

A sassy little kitten with multiple ex husbands who only cares about wine, wine, and wine. Often times you will find this species in soccer mom form, usually with the accessory of a wine travel mug normally given as a forgiveness gift from their ex husband begging not to kill them and bury there bones behind their mother in laws fridge. Shows true passion in gossiping with other moms about hot 50 year old actors, teachers, and ex husbands who have been made into wine.

The winemom yelled at the children on the soccer team, swinging a glass full of wine in one hand with a face full of anger and splattered with the blood of her child’s soccer coach.

by redtomatosauce November 16, 2022

Wine Mom

A middle-aged female (usually a mother) who enjoys drinking a refined, complex red or white wine most likely bought from Whole Foods with her other middle-aged female friends while exchanging neighborhood gossip. Common topics during this odd ritual include but are not limited to: annoying children, idiotic husbands, fundraisers for an elementary or middle school, that one neighbor who enjoys starting drama, and other neighbors who choose not to maintain their lawn. Wine mothers also tend to post their gatherings on Facebook.

Brenda: Sharon, would you like to join us this evening? We're drinking your favorite!
Sharon: Of course! You know, Martin won't be home tonight, but the kids will be fine.
Brenda: Oh Sharon, you are such little spit-fire! I admire your courage and spontaneous attitude.
Brenda's emo daughter: Ugh, you guys are such wine moms.

by smigwig February 22, 2018

Wine Mom

A Karen, but with Alcohol.

Likes to think her alcoholism makes her funny or quirky, but in truth is a shallow attempt to disguise the fact that they have no personality beyond insipid gossip and booze.

Oh god, another freakin' Wine Mom. She's gonna spill her cheap hooch everywhere talking about how great 50 shades of grey was before passing out in the bathroom like the last ones did.

by Nugget tm May 13, 2020

Wine Mom

Women who are in the older crowd(Usually mothers) that sip wine throughout the night, and sometimes post on social media about it. Their posts are abnormally sincere, with comments made by fellow wine moms, relatives, or other parents. The main focus of a wine mom is to stay classy, share intriguing quotes(Usually decorated with graphics dating back in 2004), and to be the embodiment of Linda Belcher. The opposite of a Vodka Aunt.

Wine Moms on Facebook:
"Darling, size does matter... when it comes to your wine glass, LOL."
"Oh Linda, you're such a wild card!!! say hi to Bob and the kids for me!"
"LINDA,,, THIS IS GRANDMA GLORIA,,,, I'M TRYING TO SEND A FAX, CALL ME ASAP,,,"

by Lazy Doki April 28, 2015

Wingmom

Noun: A mother in which will help her son get laid, usually at a bar or a large gathering. This method of bringing along a wingmom is much more rewarding because it comes off to women as a man being sensitive and a family-man rather than a future one-night stand;
exactly like a wingman, but it's your mom.

"I haven't gotten laid in forever. Luckily, I'm going out for some beers with my wingmom tonight."

by hansonpaulsey December 1, 2009

wifemom

A wife much older than her husband.

Demi Moore is Ashton Kutcher's wifemom.

by bootyjuicewithberry April 17, 2009

Wine mom

Quite simply Karen Wine O'clock comes home from work after being unable to 'speak to the manager'regarding the unbalanced composition of salad leaves found in her takeaway lunch salad box from Pret à Manger and attempts to drown her self-absorbed sorrows in a bottle of cheap quality but moderately priced plonk from her nearest branch of Waitrose whilst whining down the phone to other wine mom's whilst 'putting the world to rights' from their narrow minded middle class limited world perspective.

'There's a customer called Karen who wants to make a complaint boss'....'ok tell I'm coming...no, on second thoughts tell her to piss off and drown her self-entitled short-comings into bottle of Echo Falls...fucking wine moms'

by anonymous December 15, 2022