hansonpaulsey's definitions

Bloom

Verb: The act of having explosive diarrhea and accidentally getting feces on your balls; the act of defecating on someone else's balls in order for them to be pleasured by the act.

"Damn. After that Chipotle we ate last night, I ended up accidentally blooming. My balls looked like they were dipped in chocolate."

"Sandy bloomed on my balls last night before sex. The warmth turned me on to no end."

by Hansonpaulsey October 14, 2009

Bowel Towel

Noun; After taking a shit and being unaware that you are out of toilet paper, your next best option is to use a towel conveniently hung near the toilet.

"After Michael dropped a deuce, his next best option was the bowel towel hanging next to the tub."

by hansonpaulsey December 27, 2009

Gripjob

When an overly-excited or inexperienced girl attempts to give you a handjob but then ends up choking your dick to the point that it almost isn't worth it anymore.

9th grader: "Dude did you get some friday night!?"
another 9th grader: "Yeah but the girl gave me a gripjob and now it hurts to piss."

by Hansonpaulsey October 11, 2009

Sintention

Noun: Someone's only intention of doing something is to commit a sin.

Examples:

To talk to a man or woman with the main intention if having sex.

To be friends or nicer than usual to someone with the intention of using them for his or her possessions or hook-ups.

"My only sintention of actually talking to this stupid girl is to have sex with her."

by hansonpaulsey November 22, 2009

Death Star

Noun: A death star is done by fisting a woman's asshole or vagina and while said fist is inside you open up your hand ( spreading out all 5 fingers) inside the woman.

"I gave that girl a death star since her pussy was so loose!"

by Hansonpaulsey October 13, 2009

Happy Wok

Noun: A chinese man's happy trail

American Teenager: "Dude, check out my epic happy trail!"
Chinese Teenager: "Check out my happy wok!"

by hansonpaulsey December 13, 2009

McDream

Noun: A McDonald's Dollar Menu combination of the top bun, lettuce, chicken patty, and mayonnaise of a McChicken on top of the two beef patties, cheese, onion, pickles, ketchup, and bottom bun of a double cheeseburger; sometimes referred to as a "Double Chickenburger", "McEcstasy" and "The 2 Dollar Heart-Attack"

"Eat a McDream today and you'll possibly be McDreaming for eternity!"

by Hansonpaulsey October 12, 2009