wan2k 

Wan2k is derived from the common abbreviation of the "Windows 2000" operationg system, "win2k".

The humour centres around the word being similar to "wank", to masturbate.

John: I can't get sound to work in Frontier.
Fred: what operating system are you using?
John: wan2k :-/

wan2k by Frantic November 25, 2003

WankCock

A WankCock is a person who has very little understanding of the science to which he or she is claiming to base their decisions. They are typically bossy, saying things like "this is not a request, it is an instruction". WankCock's are very often incompetent and can be seen in positions of responsibility to which they are wholly unsuited. Without the mental capacity to challenge simple concepts they defer to bluster to hide their inadequacies.

Can be used in a sentence or simply as an insult by itself (similar to "tosser" or "twat").

Named after the original WankCock, Matt Hancock; an MP in the UK Parliament, 2020.

"Come on mate, you're clearly wrong; don't be such a wankcock"

"WankCock" (whilst rolling eyes)

WankCock by UmbraHorse September 26, 2020

wisdom wank 

The act of masturbating in order to gain clear insight into a troubling decision or situation.

Bro, I wanted to cheat on her, but after my wisdom wank, I was fine.

wisdom wank by teaseit August 5, 2014

Sad Wank 

To go home after a bad night out or other disheartening event and console ones self by sitting in the dark and having a wank. Also know as pulling a Joni or an SW. ( crying optional but recommended)

Just got knocked back by a blind midget... I'm going home for a sad wank.

Sad Wank by The Marine Scientist November 12, 2013

cyber danger wank 

Rubbing one out under the desk during a Zoom meeting. Simply put, choking the chicken down low while being professional up top.

Ashley- “Did you see Matt’s arm shaking during the Zoom”?

David- “I’ll bet the over he was doing a cyber danger wank”.

cyber danger wank by Hucklebucker September 29, 2020

wank bollocks 

really bad thing

oh mate thats totally wank bollocks

wank bollocks by wankbollocks December 7, 2021

Wank Royal 

A wank with a Johnny on. The kind of wank you treat yourself to have, you don't have it everyday because its the 'royal' treatment.

Adapted from the inbetweeners - Neil, if the pressures ever to much you can borrow one of my johnnys and have a wank royal. A what? You know a wank royal, a wank with a johnny on.

Wank Royal by smackmyass August 27, 2013