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shitistics 

calculating the mass of someones life time shit production based on their diet and health
Well... I know a man his age (76) should have produced about 24,320lbs (11,030 kg) of shit in his lifetime so far. If we convert those 76 years into days we have 27759 days. Now it is normal and healthy to have a bowel movement anywhere between three times a week to three times a day, but my dad always ate dinner at the same time and used the bathroom approximately once a day. Therefore we can conclude that he has shat approximately 27759 times in his lifetime, maybe a little less or a little more. If we divide those 24,320lbs he has dropped in his lifetime with the days he has lived, we should get 0,87lbs which is 0,39kg and therefore we can take a guess and say that his last shit weighted about 0,87 pounds or 0,39kg. Now the average weight of a human log is around 1/4 of a pound to 1 pound (or 0,11kg to 0,45kg). With this information we can tell that the turd was a little on the skinny side but he is healthy and probably doing well. This is shitistics.
shitistics by wanwanwan September 21, 2022
Related Words

shittist 

A religion with the beliefs that all things were created from shit. And this thing called shit broke off into smaller pieces of shit to form galaxies and planets. Shit was created by the supreme turd Duda'h (The Mighty Doo Doo Turd)and its worshippers read from The Book of Duda'h about the awesome powers of the shit-turd. The Book of Duda'h teaches that The Mighty Doo Doo Turd communicated to chosen people through what is called a "Hawning" where The Mighty Doo Doo Turd births himself into living form in a host during defecation. Those people who do not believe in the powers of The Mighty Doo Doo Turd are anti-shittists.
The Shittist religion is the only true religion!!!!!!!!! All praise due to The Mighty Doo Doo Turd.
shittist by Mr. Dwayne June 15, 2008

shitlist 

A metaphorical list in which people who are in ill favor with a given individual are placed.
that beeotch has been pissing me off for the last week, she's going on my shitlist
shitlist by kpaxken May 13, 2005

shitlist 

(n) a list of entities exhibiting general disfavorability, particularly as a result of transgression. Presumably these entities will not receive the normal benefits enjoyed by those not on the list.
(v) the act of placing someone on said list.
Every single thing I've bought from Black & Decker, two coffeemakers and a rice cooker, has totally stopped working. They are *SO* on my shitlist.
shitlist by nplastic January 28, 2004

Shitmisting 

when you mush up shit into water and put it in a plant sprayer thing and mist it all over door handles
yo dog, no money, no car, no alcohol, no women. Time to go shitmisting
Shitmisting by Geoff Agnew June 5, 2010

anti-shittist 

One who does not accept the Mighty Doo Doo Turd (Duda'h) as his personal savior.
Anti-shittists try to redicule the shittist religion
anti-shittist by Mr. Dwayne June 15, 2008