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shitistics
Well... I know a man his age (76) should have produced about 24,320lbs (11,030 kg) of shit in his lifetime so far. If we convert those 76 years into days we have 27759 days. Now it is normal and healthy to have a bowel movement anywhere between three times a week to three times a day, but my dad always ate dinner at the same time and used the bathroom approximately once a day. Therefore we can conclude that he has shat approximately 27759 times in his lifetime, maybe a little less or a little more. If we divide those 24,320lbs he has dropped in his lifetime with the days he has lived, we should get 0,87lbs which is 0,39kg and therefore we can take a guess and say that his last shit weighted about 0,87 pounds or 0,39kg. Now the average weight of a human log is around 1/4 of a pound to 1 pound (or 0,11kg to 0,45kg). With this information we can tell that the turd was a little on the skinny side but he is healthy and probably doing well. This is shitistics.
shitistics by wanwanwan September 21, 2022
Related Words
Shitistic • Shitist • Shitistis • Shitistist • shit is tight • shitstain • shitastic • shitiot • shitastrophe • shitstack
fred shitstain
fred shitstain by OniFTW February 3, 2014
shitstill
when you are ready to shit in a public bathroom, yet somebody comes in, and you hold it so that they won't hear embarassing noises coming from you (in essence, you are "sitting still"), and THEN you shit once they leave.
Roger: Hey, Dave! You don't look so good.
Dave: Man, someboy came in when I REALLY had to crap, and I had to have a shitstill until they left. It REALLY hurt to have to hold it for so long!
Dave: Man, someboy came in when I REALLY had to crap, and I had to have a shitstill until they left. It REALLY hurt to have to hold it for so long!
shitstill by brooskitooski January 6, 2011
shittist
A religion with the beliefs that all things were created from shit. And this thing called shit broke off into smaller pieces of shit to form galaxies and planets. Shit was created by the supreme turd Duda'h (The Mighty Doo Doo Turd)and its worshippers read from The Book of Duda'h about the awesome powers of the shit-turd. The Book of Duda'h teaches that The Mighty Doo Doo Turd communicated to chosen people through what is called a "Hawning" where The Mighty Doo Doo Turd births himself into living form in a host during defecation. Those people who do not believe in the powers of The Mighty Doo Doo Turd are anti-shittists.
shittist by Mr. Dwayne June 15, 2008
shitstem
The Shitis
The gastrointestinal distress felt as a consequence of eating at the cultural phenomenon known as Denny's. A combination of The Itis and The Shits, Shitis takes effect the instant the Denny's waitress brings your check. Early symptoms include nausea, bloating, lethargy and a sense of extreme drowsiness.
In the later stages, those affected will experience bloating, smelly gas, and explosive greasy leakage from the anus, too horrible to be considered an average case of diarrhea.
The only effective treatment for The Shitis is to build up a tolerance for food considered unsafe for human consumption. This can be accomplished by regularly consuming Fried Cheese Melts at Denny's topped with bacon, and a side of fries.
In the later stages, those affected will experience bloating, smelly gas, and explosive greasy leakage from the anus, too horrible to be considered an average case of diarrhea.
The only effective treatment for The Shitis is to build up a tolerance for food considered unsafe for human consumption. This can be accomplished by regularly consuming Fried Cheese Melts at Denny's topped with bacon, and a side of fries.
I was about to get some after taking my girl out to Denny's, but I developed The Shitis during foreplay and made a mess. At least it was in her bed and not mine.
The Shitis by Dark Chocolate V2 March 18, 2013
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A phenomenon in film/television series, most notably streaming series, where the main premise is drawn out to such a point that it takes an entire season or more to get the parts of the series the audience is actually interested in seeing.
For example, if a series is titled "Surf Dracula," a majority of viewers would tune in expecting to see Dracula surfing by the first or second episode. However, the entire first season would instead be tedious padding and backstory before finally ending with Dracula surfing in the last five minutes of the season finale.
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I watched "Smallville" on Netflix the other day. Dude, it was ten seasons of filler before he finally flew! Major Surf Dracula Syndrome!
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