Skip to main content
Urban Dictionary Merch
Your favorite words on things you can wear, drink from, read, or give to a friend.
The Urban Dictionary Store sells gifts you’ll have to explain.

Ba’alaket

An alien overlord species that uses feminine wiles to influence and manipulate the human species, especially men, but they aren’t above having a furry taco now and again. Think "space sirens.” They currently hardly talk to human women because, I mean hey, if you have electric jelly-fish vulvas, what is the point of encouraging jealousy?

In the past, every-time they try to help they really end up just making us bigger sex fiends than we already are, and then we call them names like succubus, demon... evil mermaid, although most of these names were probably thought up by women who are just jealous of their electro-pussies and their ability to steal their men.

The Ba'alaket are masters (mistresses?) Of disguise and poison. They have "cloaking" technology that makes our brains perceive them as regular humans allowing them to walk amongst us unhindered.
“Hey Mary, weren’t you and Tom a thing? What happened?”

“Yeah, we were, but that Ba’alaket Kesha got her hands on him and now not only is he glossy-eyed and slow-witted, but he’s also an ambassador to the UN.”

“That sucks, I told you she was a succubus-demon witch, right? Let’s go shopping and get you a new vibrator and you can help me pick out the clinic for my next abortion.”
Ba’alaket by Byrdlady June 30, 2019
Related Words

Alaskan crab cake 

An act of pure ritual fetish where by the man cums and shits inside the woman's vagina lips, pinches them together, smacks his mistress ass (i.e. in a three way), then has her eat the shit out of his other hoe's vagina. Historically the ritual involved a dog's prolapsed rectum (i.e. Ritual participants would feed the dog Juan Pablo's Devil Juice to achieve rectal blowout), whale dicks and cattle semen, but since the age of enlightening has become simplified.
Geewhizzz i saw Suzy Rotten Crotch eat Billy's girl's Alaskan Crab Cake with extreme prejudice.

The Alaskan Pancake Pile Driver Upside Down Milk Machine 

A complex sexual position in which an Alaskan woman is tied naked upside down to a maple tree, covered in syrup, and milked before being humped.
The Alaskan Pancake Pile Driver Upside Down Milk Machine is a common maneuver in the northern outskirts of Canada, where the act will not be interfered with by law enforcement, as it is illegal.

Alaskan Blowhole

When your having sex with a girl and you want to fill all holes. you put your dick in her vagina. then your two thumbs in the ears with your pinky's covering the nostril. while your kissing her then shove your big toe up her ass. this will completely cover the holes.
Steven L.: Hey you want to try something new.
Hannah L. : Like what?
Steven L.: Can I give you an Alaskan blowhole.
Alaskan Blowhole by DLDLP February 8, 2017
1. A fictional place name used for sarcastic responses to "where are you" or related scenarios.

2. A word meaning a magical action, usually used sarcastically.
Person 1 - "Where are you right now?"
Person 2 - "Oh you know in the land of Alakazoo"
Person 1 - "Really?"
Person 2 - "Oh my gosh, NO!!!!"

Person 1 - "How would that happen?"
Person 2 - "I don't know maybe a freaking wizard comes a long and says bippity boppity akawaka alakazoo dippity doo and boom it's done! Like come on..."
Alakazoo by Dr. Aarben March 12, 2013
He goes by many names: Alamka, Mycran, Aloomka, Ted Stevens, and others, but is known universally as Alamka. A god amongst men who controls the universes, and throws volunteers in to wreck these universes for amusement. Alamka sees all, Alamka hears all, but who is the man himself? Nobody knows, although the legendary Jabro has claimed to sight Alamka in our mortal universe. Many people decry him as a cult leader, but he does not stoop to their level, acting as if they were absent. He is the true, ultimate, beyond-life entity.
ALL HAIL ALAMKA
Alamka by Wheres the goddamn bus August 12, 2021
More from Urban Dictionary

Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
When your wife’s boyfriend let you sleep past 8pm 😎😎
Wife’s boyfriend: You have 5 more minutes
Me: Poggers!
Poggers by Just_Charles April 14, 2020
Word of the Day on October 26, 2026
Load more