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See: a very old hipster - too old for the practice. He or she has not given up the fight to listen to bands that nobody cares about, on vinyl. Often says "this is REALLY FUCKING ELECTRONIC!". Was spotted at an Elvis Costello concert wearing a brimmed hat. Ruins plastic rimmed glasses for everyone. Has an STD, probably.
There were so many cryptsters at the Pixies show we ran out of PBR by song three.
cryptster by Dr. Daffodil April 23, 2008
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Crysterbate 

The art of crying while you masturbate.
Hey man, That sucks that Sarah dumped you but you can stop locking you self in the bathroom to crysterbate, tears wont get you off any faster
Crysterbate by leTed August 24, 2008

crapsterbate

the act of taking a crap while masterbating to save time
computer nerds do it most often while taking a break from WOW or halo or any other of that stupid shit
marvin took a break to crapsterbate after four solid hours of unreal tournament
crapsterbate by mr.salty May 28, 2006

Magnet of Crysteries 

Magnet of Crysteries is actually Cabinet of Mysteries said by a drunk "dead" robot named Vision after accidentally eating a chewing gum. No offence Wanda!
Illusion : And now ladies and gentlemen, for our grand finale, I bring you, The Magnet of Crysteries!
Glamour: Cabinet of Mysteries!
Illusion: Yeah, yeah, what she said.
n. Any ridiculously old "rocker" who insists on dancing about with his parchment-like skin sagging off his face and his shirt unbuttoned.

......................................................................................
My eyes! My eyes!

What's wrong dude?

I just saw Mick Jiggler unbutton his shirt! This concert should have had a crypter warning. Hand me another beer.
crypter by gnostic 1 December 14, 2012

craftsterbation 

(n.) lusting over projects on craftster.org or the process of crafting.
Millie has her door shut and all I can hear is the rhythmic thudding and whirring of her sewing machine. I think she's craftsterbating again.
craftsterbation by betsy January 20, 2005

cripster 

A hipster that is also crippled.
He's a cripster, dude... he's rocking the hipster angle AND the sympathy angle all in one!
cripster by illuminatedwax November 25, 2010