Mike was so upset that his girlfriend cheated on him that he spent the entire night crysterbating while listening to The Cure.

Larry is really into crysterbation, especially since his wife left him.

PAUL: I'm going to beat your ass.

JACK: Fuck around and find out, fool!

Portrayed accurately in Little Ashes by Robert Pattinson when his gay lover hooks up with the girl he loves while he is in the room (confused yet? Don't be, basically Robert Pattinson is incapable of playing a character that questions his sexuality) (oh by the way, Little Ashes is an accurate portrayl of Salvador Dali's life, soooo as far as I know, Salvador Dali is the only case of crysterbation in mass media. More win for surrealists) "I thought he was simply crying in his room until he ran out of breath and I heard something else; he was clearly crysterbating."

your on the north pole your tears are frozen....crysterbation