canadashistory 

An incredibly depraved sex act that includes moose antlers, a jug of maple syrup and the Stanley Cup.
The most difficult part of this sex act is "getting it all in there".

So... You wanna come back to my place and explore canadashistory?

canadashistory by TheCanfield February 4, 2010

canadas history 

Canada's History is a depraved sexual act first performed around 1898 in the lawless Yukon territory by "Meaty" Georges Gagnon, a French-Canadian prospector during the Klondike Gold Rush. Georges performed the act on many willing and unwilling men, women, children, and domesticated animals (the rumors of this act being performed on moose and kodiak bears are unconfirmed). The act was called a "Dark mar on Canada's History" by local politicians, and "the only interesting thing in Canada's History" by American papers sensationalizing the Klondike Gold Rush.

The act itself was said to originally consist of Georges approaching with moose antlers strapped to his head. Georges (known for having meaty lumberjack hands) would then proceed to fist the orifice of his victim. Georges would proceed to insert his penis into the fist within the orifice and masturbate to ejaculation.

Georges used "the only lubrication worthy of a true Canadian Gold Man", maple syrup. He would chug the syrup, while cursing the Queen and lavishly praising Gold.

Modernly, the act has changed to honor hockey legend, Wayne Gretzky (many considered it source of his greatness). A proper rendition of Canada's History now requires that the victim be bent over, face resting in the cup, which is filled to the brim with maple syrup.

The act risks asphyxiation and is so dangerous that Canadian Healthcare System uses a form called a 1206c(h), which is to be filled out in the case of injuries resulting from the act.

Roommate 1: Geez, eh, you were loud last night with that girl. What were you doing in there, Canadas History?

Roommate 2: No, but not for a lack of trying, eh. We were out of maple syrup.

Roommate 1: Fine Canadians we are eh? Forgive us Georges.

canadas history by kingkongNINJA February 6, 2010

Canadas History 

A depraved sex act which involves inserting the stanley cup in to a womens ass. Then soaking your penis in maple syrup. Sticking the maple syrup up her vagina. then takeing your maple syrup soaked penis and comencing to throat fuck the women all while humming "oh canada"
Thanks stephen colbert

guy 1: you know that Rachel girl?

Guy 2: yeah.

Guy 1: dude i gave her the complete canadas history last night!

Canadas History by That fatguy February 4, 2010

Canadas History 

CH is a special act during which a prepubescent male moose is fed maple syrup for no less than 3 months, during that time all fecal matter is collected in a cup-like vessel made of silver and nickel-alloy commonly refereed to as the Stanley Cup.

After that time the moose is sure to have died of diabetes and its set of antlers and the filled cup are used to disable all inhibitions in post-menopausal killer-whales which in turn enables cross breeding with African Elephants to help stabilize their numbers.
This has led to an increase in Elephants over the recent months and their status as an endangered species is close to being revoked.

Thanks to Canadas History, we can start poaching again.

If it weren't for a lot of Canada's History, ebony would be twice as expensive

Canadas History by Africanelephantlover February 5, 2010

Canadas History 

When you pour maple syrup all over your balls and dip them in someones mouth while pissing up their nose and shitting on a Canadian flag

Yo i just saw a video online of someone giving a Canadas History to some slut

Canadas History by Peter McPeterson February 4, 2010

Canadas History 

The act of inducing labor with a non-pregnant male with a hockey stick dipped in syrup.

Last week a friend of mine experienced Canadas History and was killed.

Canadas History by projectA91 February 5, 2010

canadas history 

A depraved sex act in which partners rip off their maple soaked denim underwear using moose antlers attached to their heads. The womans head is then sumbmerged in the stanley cup full of maple syrup while the man chokes her with his suspenders while plowing her in the rectum. Right before she passes out from lack of oxygen she wacks him in the balls repeatedly with a hockey stick to let him know "it is time" at which point he defficates in her mouth as she comes up for air. Finally they shove hockey pucks in each other anuses and continue intercourse as usual the act is only complete when the woman tranfers the man's maple soaked feces back to him orally.

All of this is done on under the watchful eye of The Beaver, however this act is rarely completed before the couple is eaten by a canadian bear

Dude I'm really enjoying studying Canadas History with this chick.

canadas history by BigredXIII February 5, 2010