bedbugs 

Tiny little insects that one never sees, but knows are there; they have been, are, and will forever more be denied nightly meals.

(said before bed)
"Don't let the bedbugs bite!"

bedbugs by Benbo Baggins August 8, 2005

Bedbugs 

The modern-day version of the Black Plague.

The only difference between bedbugs and the black plague is that the plague kills you with fevers and sores, while bedbugs make you itch to death.

Bedbugs by Foamy Chewbacca Jr. April 14, 2011

Bedbugs 

They live in your padded furniture and feed off your blood and are almost impossible to exterminate.

"I would rather gargle buckshot than have bedbugs."
"Bedbugs are to furniture what crackheads are to ghettos."
"Bedbugs are the reason we had to move and get rid of our couches."
"Bedbugs are a biological weapon."
"Goodnight, sleep tight. Don't let the bedbugs bite."

Bedbugs by MadamexXx March 14, 2009

bedbugs 

drugs. Illegal ones.

"'Ere mister, got any bedbugs....?"

bedbugs by Earl Montmorency Grey July 18, 2005

Check your bedbugs

The cool way to say goodnight.

„gn baby gorl, sleep well“
„Check your bedbugs“

Check your bedbugs by ClancyP January 24, 2026

Bedbug

Writers of op-eds with really shitty takes. Primarily named Bret Stephens

The New York Times has a serious bedbug infestation.

Bedbug by ZMES August 27, 2019

BedBuster 

A raunchy song that inevitably stirs up “demon time😈” sexual energy that can destroy bed frames and mattresses.

“Bro, Trey Songz new album is full of bedbusters. It had me and Sharkeisha on demon time 😈 last night.”

BedBuster by Huncho kdubbie December 10, 2020