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atturney 

A two-faced Fletcher Reede who either secretly "switches sides" --- i.e., he doesn't remain loyal to his client as far as defending or representing him--- or was never really working for him in the first place.
Sometimes it's best to hire legal counsel from outside your immediate area, especially if your case involves politically-inflammatory issues --- there are often too many atturneys around who would not wanna "rock da boat" or offend any of da local judges or other authority-officials by advocating or lobbying for unpopular change.
atturney by QuacksO December 24, 2023
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Cocksucking Attorney 

1. Incorporates August 30, 2007 definition of the word Cocksucker.
2. Applies to attorneys who take one position on a legal matter.
3. However, in court, they actively exploit the legal matter to their benefit, to the detriment of others.
4. Typically used in situations related to poor ethics where the attorney puts their own personal interest ahead of their client or the courts.
1. (Class Action Settlement) "Did you hear about that settlement for the iThingy Defect? I got .38 cents for it and the attorneys at Dewey, Cheatem, and Howe told us they were doing this out of principle, and not looking for a payday, yet they received $62 million. Those Cocksucking Attorneys!"

2. (Litigation) "I can't believe the courts sanctioned me for bringing a frivolous lawsuit. Schlosky told my case was solid, made me pay him $5,000 to file this lawsuit, and now I have to pay a $10,000 fine to the court! Michael is such a Cocksucking Attorney!

3. (Public Debate) "Did you read Einhorn's argument against using waivers to disclaim fraud in court? Yet this guy is using the same tactics to get his dirty client off the hook? How can this Cocksucking Attorney sleep at night."

4. (Conflict of Interest) "I found out today that Lisa, my attorney for the malpractice suit that left me disabled, is a cousin for the doctor we're suing. How can I trust her when she's spending holidays with that monster. I now question everything she's ever told me about this case, and need to fire her ASAP. She is such a Cocksucking Attorney."

5. (Poorly managed expectations) "That Cocksucking Attorney Ralph told us to expect a windfall from being insulted by the waitress of Bojangles, we paid him over $100,000 to represent us, and all we got were coupons for free pancakes".

Eric Holder - Attorney General 

Eric Holder is a perfect example of a token puppet nigger appointed to the position of U.S. Attorney General that functions as dictated by a racially biased, self-serving, administration that will not uphold the law with respect to any legal issue that may reflect negatively on blacks, whom they rely on to further their political agenda(s). At the time of this writing, two major issues face this scum sucking moolie. The first being the refusal to pursue black on white crime as 'hate' crime, even though it is obvious to everybody that this was the motive. The second is the 'Fast and Furious' scandal that ultimately helped cause the deaths of law enforcement personnel. The agenda here being the false argument in favor of banning semi-automatic firearms, claiming they are falling into the hands of criminals across the border. This of course they would hope would open the flood gates to still more forms of gun control in an attempt to disarm the American public.
That shitstain Eric Holder - Attorney General is refusing to present documents relating to the Fast and Furious scandal to congress. I hope they don't just nail the spook for contempt, but throw his worthless watermelon ass in the slammer with some Aryan Brotherhood folks. Ever see the videos of this coon talking about brainwashing America’s youth against firearms? A prime example of how a nigger feels this country should be run.

Ace Attorney 

A courtroom/crime drama series by Capcom which started in Japan in 2001 as a GameBoy Advance game called Gyakuten Saiban. More commonly identified by its rather popular titular character, Phoenix Wright. You basically have to investigate every crime, with some interesting/annoying characters along the way then battle it out in the courtroom with prosecutors who are German or arrogant as f***. Also, 3 of the games have the assistants underage for no goddamn reason. Has currently 5 games released in the US, 7 in Japan (not including one spinoff) and one announced for both regions. Has a crapton of Mangas and Artbooks. Also has quite the supply of rabid fangirls who are guaranteed to ship every two characters in the series together. ALL OF THEM. Their fans are dedicated to the series, to the point that when the main character changed for once most of them were so angry Phoenix Wright had to get back. Also, has many ask roleplay blogs on Tumblr.

Titular Characters: Phoenix Wright, Apollo Justice, Miles Edgeworth
Fangirl: OH EM GEE THIS TWO I SHIP THEM TOO MUCH EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK *faints*

Person 1: OBJECTION!
Person 2: SHUT UP.

Fan: APOLLO JUSTICE SUCKS PHOENIX WRIGHT FTW

Fangirl: EDGEWORTH!!!!111one!!! *faints*

Fan: Guys, the new Ace Attorney game has Phoenix Wright again!
Other Fans: YESSSSSS!!!

*insert Tumblr here*
Ace Attorney by Donnman March 18, 2013

dump truck attorney 

A derisive term to describe an incompetent and sometimes elderly attorney assigned by the state to represent a prison inmate going before the Board Of Prison Hearings who cannot afford a private one.
Yup, I’ve got another sad sack shot before the Board again this year with another dump truck attorney to mangle my case facts and the possibility of release.

Attorney's Badge 

The most valuable piece of evidence for a spiky haired lawyer in a blue suit.
"Your honor! This attorney's badge contradicts the testimony!"
"How??"
"fuck"
Attorney's Badge by A smalltown disc September 14, 2021

Keyboard Attorney 

Random kids on the internet who think they're attorneys without knowing what the hell it is. They think they're lawyers, when in reality they don't know jack, and their moms just told the they're good at arguing and that they should become a lawyer.
Beyond Scared Straight Deputy: Hit me if you want to, girl!

Girl: *Hits deputy

"Lukezilla" from Youtube: "lEgaLLy iF sOmeONe gIvEs yOu pErmISsIon aS tHe OfFiceR dID iT is oKAy tO hIt tHe pERson gIRl dID nOthIng wRonG"

Me: Okay "Lukezilla". Smh, so many Keyboard Attorneys out here

Lukezilla's mom: "Lukey stop being a Keyboard Attorney and go to bed"

Lukezilla: Shut up bitch I'll kill you!
More from Urban Dictionary

briefcake 

"Did you check out the briefcake in courtroom C?"
briefcake by Ben Frey April 6, 2006
Word of the Day on November 3, 2026
Brought to public attention by Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein in the book on the fall of Richard Nixon, All The President’s Men, ratfucker was Nixon’s term for a political operative who sows chaos among opponents; an agent provocateur. It is thought to have originated among campus political rivalries at USC, and seems to have some usage in the US military.
Along with Nixon’s other ratfuckers, Roger Stone caused fights at otherwise peaceful Democratic Party protests to generate a false narrative that the Democrats were violent and dangerous.
Ratfucker by Ricky Ramjet November 2, 2017
Word of the Day on November 2, 2026

countrypolitan 

Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
Word of the Day on November 1, 2026

Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
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