A female who will do anything for a bottle of Smirnoff. The alcowhore is usually found lurking around college campuses (which is ironic because she is usually illiterate and borderline retarded). The typical alcowhore attire consists of halter top and jeans/mini skirt that are 2 sizes too small and result in a muffin top or hungry jack. The alchowhore can be attractive or hideous, their looks are
irrelevant to their greedy, sllor-worthy behavior. The alcowhore is a cheapskate
mooch and uses her feminine wiles to dupe equally retarded males into giving them
free drinks. Does this sound like you or someone you know? Since 62.3% of all college
girls are alcowhore take this simple
test to find out.
You Know You're an Alcowhore If:
1. Someone owes you
50 bucks. Instead they give you 6-pack of Smirnoff Ice. You think this is fair payment
2. You have sucked a dick for a
shot...come on
don'
t lie
3. You have made out with other
girls to get drinks. Contrary to popular belief, this is not hot, or cool. This is alchowhorism at it's finest.
4. You have a collection of empty liquor bottles in your bookcase, but can't find your textbooks.
5. You wake up very confused in a futon with 2 hairy men wrapped around nd spot a half-empty bottle of Cap Mo's on the
floor. The fact that you were quite p
ossibly raped doesnt bother you...you got [free Cap Mo's!!
6. You never have paid for a drop of liquor in your life. Yet you are plastered 80% of the week.
If you have answered yes to 2 or more of these questions. you are an alcowhore. Get treatment before you spread your disease to the other tanoerxic hoes you call your friends
OG Whore: OMG, lets like go to the Sig Ep house and get drunk
New Whore on the Block: But however will we get liquor? We are underaged and
broke? Must we buy
fake IDs?
OGW: Fuck that
shit. You have boobs dont you? Now lets go to work
The Alcowhores travels from dorm to dorm depleting the campus's liquor supply on room at a time. THE END!!
