Skip to main content
An erection that is obtained during Judaic prayers. Typically one acquires a Shmoner during the silent Judaic prayers such as the silent "Amida."Shmoners are very uncomfortable, irritating, and distracting. When one gets a Shmoner he typically attempts to conceal it by either putting the erection in the waistline of his pants, sitting down, or simply just by flicking his right nut. It has been proven that the most effective method to get rid of a Shmoner is by in fact; flicking the right testicle.
Person A: "Blessed are You God Almighty who gives us rain."
Person B: "Holy Crap! You have a giant Shmoner!"
Person A: " Shit. I get one every time I try to pray it sucks and they do not go away."
Person C: " Try flicking your right nut.. it works for me:)"

Person A: " K I'll try.....Shit that hurts......I'm cramping up but now it's gone and I can pray!"
Shmoner by Moshe Silverberg October 27, 2011
Related Words

Shmoozered 

“Dude, I’m fucking Shmoozered right now
“Ima bouta get shmoozered”
Shmoozered by Danksmonker69 June 6, 2019

Shlongered 

When something is beyond repair, unfixable or otherwise fully shlongered.
Zach: “hey, is that hose fitting salvageable or do we need a new one?”

Caden: “no way! It’s completely and utterly shlongered”.
Shlongered by Zach Pitzler October 4, 2019

Shmoozer 

ONE WHO SHMOOZES. A smooth talker. Someone who has a way with words and uses it to their advantage. (i.e with members of the opposite sex)
He's known as a shmoozer when it comes to the ladies.
Shmoozer by Shoelaces October 6, 2011
A boner that one contracts whilst reciting the Jewish prayer, the “shmonah esrei”
“I had a shmoner during shacharis this morning

“Read the magic touch, bro. It’ll change your life.”
Shmoner by applestrudelman May 12, 2019
An accumulation of excessive semi-dried nasal mucus (boogers) as a result of breathing pollution (e.g. smog).
Damn, the smog in Mexico City causes some wicked smoogers.
Smooger by Cooperrrrrrrr March 30, 2009