Patoir 

A stupid, frenchman who is a boy scout and has sex with a moose.

"You just had sex with a moose on your french boy scout trip. I knew you were a patoir!"

Patoir by TS1235 January 11, 2008

Hackney Patois 

The current speaking style favoured by London's urban yoof is heavily accented as well as typified by slang expressions. Hackney being an area of East London (in which I reside) which has the dubious honour of being the worst borough in Britain repeatedly. Please note that the slang described here is common throughout britian, and is an accent developed often by well spoken people to attain street cred.
The general Hackney Patois comes from a mash up of east london cockney, afro- carribbean, general chavspeak and Hip-Hop slang often attributed to British Asian yoof as popularised by Ali G.

The vocabulary is inextricably linked to cellular phone sms (text) messaging, and online instant messaging, where limited space and speed of texting required abbreviations (m8 - mate, l8r - later, etc.) So much that often the true spelling of words are forgotten. Predictive text messaging has reversed some language - e.g 'book' was used for 'cool' as that was easier to text is now being used in language.
The 'grime' music scene sees Hackney Patois at its core - see artists such as M.I.A and Lady Soverign

as overheard in Hackney patois....
"Put dat down - you iz not gonna get nuffin' "
"She luk at me like dat agen she gonna get sum licks, yea' "
" I dahn't wannit, its got peas in it, innit! "
" ya get me, bruv? "

Hackney Patois by GishGish December 24, 2007

Patois 

referring to Jamaican Patois

Contrary to popular belief Jamaican Patois is not "Broken English." If that were the case then Spanish, Italian, French, and Romanian would be considered broken Latin. Jamaican Patois is actually a language that has been influenced by multiple languages as all patois is. Patois is somewhat English based as Jamaica was an English colony but it has integrated Portuguese, Hindi, Yoruba(as well as many other West African languages), and a small amount of Spanish. Trinidadian Patois is more French and Spanish based as opposed to Jamaican patois with English. The language is referred to as Patois because that term specifically means that the language cannot be titled because of the mixture of the language.

referring to the umbrella term Patois

Patois is the french term for "dialect." A dialect usually refers to a language spoken within a country, state, state or area where another language is more predominantly spoken and the new language is based on that language. There are dialects in nearly all countries and sill slowly new ones are being created. If the term Patois is used by any other language it refers to a new language created from multiple languages. Sometimes also reffered to as Kreyol or Creole. Di

Jamaican Patois

“How yu luk so chaka chaka?”(Obvious example of it not being broken English)

-Your clothes look a mess (untidy, unkempt, wrinkled, not properly put together, or unfashionable)

Patois by IslandBwoy April 10, 2013

Pseudo-Patois 

Spoken in both London and Toronto mainly, this dialect takes words and phrases from Jamaican patois and mixes it with english/canadian words and phrases. These two regions share similar slang but are so far away from each other due to high amounts of Jamaican immigration throughout the years.

‘Wagwan’ is an example of a jamaican phrase which is popularly used in both toronto and london. A londoner may pair this greeting with ‘bruv’ and a canadian may pair it with ‘dude’. This is Pseudo-Patois

Pseudo-Patois by Just_a_simp May 19, 2019

Jamaican patois 

Jamaican Patwa {or Patois) is a so-called creole language. A "creole" is a language that has been influenced by others. In the case of Jamaican patois, the influences have come from French, Spanish, Arawak, Twi and many others.

Up until today, speaking creole has been widely regarded as "inferior", which is why Jamaican Patois has no convention for spelling and grammar. Thus you can spell it anyway you want it. For instance "brother" can be spelled "bradda", "breda" or "bretha", which only adds to the confusion. Modern dub poets like Linton Kwesi Johnson have taken it as far as spelling nearly every single word alternatively, even when the pronunciation is the same. E.g.: "one another" he spells "wananada".

There are many other varieties of patois, like Haitian patois, Santa Lucia patois, Louisiana patois etc.

Example of Shakira's Un Poco de Amor
lyrics Jamaican Patois verses:

Roots and creation com'again! / So mi guardian, mi guardian mi liff up di plana / Now everybody ago do dis one / Like in down di Caribbean / San Andrés, Providence Island / Liffit up, Mekit nuff affliction / Say goodbye to di worse segregation / Dis a di cage of di new generation / Liffit up to di high revelation

Jamaican patois by Dino March 13, 2005

patoiang 

when a bitches pussy smells like it is dead. When you catch a wiff you almost pass out.

damn heather you smell patoiang. you need to wash that decaying fish out of yourself.

patoiang by jim May 13, 2005

fuck patois 

A dialect, or patois, used mainly by college frat boys. Th word fuck must be used in every sentence, often more than once.

Fuck John! That fucking mother fucker fucked my fucking girlfriend!

fuck patois by meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee July 7, 2005