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Crank Christening
The fortunate act of being the FIRST guy to jerk off to a specific image, object, person, or other visual stimulant.
Mitch: Hey pussyfart, what did you do today?
Jeff: Have you seen that new Schticky commercial?
Mitch: Yeah
Jeff: Well, I paused it on the scene where Vince is in the mugshot, and gave it a crank christening.
Mitch: You know he beat up a hooker, right?
Jeff: That's why I did it
Mitch: You know he's a guy right?
Jeff: I wouldn't have it any other way
Mitch: You wanna hang out?
Jeff: Have you seen that new Schticky commercial?
Mitch: Yeah
Jeff: Well, I paused it on the scene where Vince is in the mugshot, and gave it a crank christening.
Mitch: You know he beat up a hooker, right?
Jeff: That's why I did it
Mitch: You know he's a guy right?
Jeff: I wouldn't have it any other way
Mitch: You wanna hang out?
Crank Christening by Burnt Juice March 30, 2012
Related Words
Chrisjen • chrisjenn • christen • Chrisjan • Chrislène • Christendom • chrisen • Chrisje • Christene • Christened
Christen Pressing
Christen Pressing is the action of zooming out of an awkward social situation, much like famous USWNT soccer player Christen Press does to get the ball away from the shirt tuggers. Because, you know, she deserves better than what the NWSL gives her.
Guy #1: I was Christen Pressing out of a conversation yesterday when they started talking about anal.
Christen Pressing by wafflebitch August 13, 2019
Christened
Christened by Nubsy December 13, 2009
christen the car
christen the car by VXWd August 22, 2006
Christensen
Christensen is creative, handsome and will put you under his spell. Once you got to know him, it's impossible not to think about him and his twinkling dark eyes which take you to galaxies far far away... He is thoughtful and considerate, thinks way ahead of things and plans the best surprises for the one he loves. If you're the luckiest girl in the world, he will smile at you, talk to you or even take you out to a museum. He might be shy to open up at first, but once he trusts you, you can be sure that he will always be your partner in crime. A Christensen appears once in a blue moon, and if he does, you better hold onto him because chances are he is the most precious thing existing on this planet and beyond. He is the man of your dreams, the lover Taylor Swift sings about and the only one you will ever love again. You'll daydream about him when he's not ard and prolly never be able to heal from the void he leaves in your heart if you ever happen to have to part from him. If your lucky enough to call him your boyfriend, you'll be couplegoals and never get over how cute af he is.
Friend: Hey, gurl, you listening?
You: Uhm, sry, I was thinking about Christensen...how is he so perfect?
You: * stupidly smiling at your phone *
Friend: Awwwww...another message from Christensen?
You: Uhm, sry, I was thinking about Christensen...how is he so perfect?
You: * stupidly smiling at your phone *
Friend: Awwwww...another message from Christensen?
Christensen by hunnu November 21, 2019
Andreas Christensen
The best centre back in the world and future captain of Chelsea FC. Often underrated by the same people who hype up van Dijk as the best of all time. Doesn't have as much credit as the other academy grads, due to Chelsea fans being xenophobic and preferring the English lads.
Person 1: Andreas Christensen is trash man, Chelsea should let him go.
Person 2: What? He's so underrated! Did you see his 2021 campaign?! He's the best CB in the world.
Person 2: What? He's so underrated! Did you see his 2021 campaign?! He's the best CB in the world.
Andreas Christensen by Elano_LCHM January 11, 2022
More from Urban Dictionary
EBK
EBK stands for "Elite Ball Knowledge." 1 In internet slang, "ball knowledge" originally referred to a deep understanding of football/soccer or basketball, but it has evolved into a broader term for having a highly sophisticated, deep, or niche understanding of any specific topic (such as music, movies, or subcultures).
Yap Trap
Yap Trap by WolfieSnack November 4, 2026
Word of the Day on November 5, 2026
Blexas
Texas is categorized as a swing state in presidential elections, but has voted for Republicans more times than for Democrats in recent history. As such, as demographics change political alignments, some Democrats believe that Texas will vote blue, or Democratic, due to their Hispanic and African American voters, who often align themselves with the Democratic Party's liberal wing.
Blexas has been cited as possible in the upcoming decades, but only if Democrats continue to win the Hispanic vote in bigger margins.
Blexas has been cited as possible in the upcoming decades, but only if Democrats continue to win the Hispanic vote in bigger margins.
Ratfucker
Brought to public attention by Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein in the book on the fall of Richard Nixon, All The President’s Men, ratfucker was Nixon’s term for a political operative who sows chaos among opponents; an agent provocateur. It is thought to have originated among campus political rivalries at USC, and seems to have some usage in the US military.
Along with Nixon’s other ratfuckers, Roger Stone caused fights at otherwise peaceful Democratic Party protests to generate a false narrative that the Democrats were violent and dangerous.
Ratfucker by Ricky Ramjet November 2, 2017
Word of the Day on November 2, 2026
countrypolitan
Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
Word of the Day on November 1, 2026