When you go into a bar or club, apply superglue to where the jukebox is plugged into the wall, wait 5 mins, then max out the jukebox on continuous plays of the Rob Thomas + Santana classic collab 'Smooth' and then wait or scram depending on bravery.
Can also apply to playing the song
repeatedly or DJing the song in such a way as one copy of the song is scratched in / beatmatched with another copy of the same song. The more
inappropriate the social setting, the more
successful the smoothing.