Skip to main content

Santa's Take 

A word created for the head of household that get's to have unmitigated, no holds barred sex with their partner due to the amount of cash, credit & various other resources drummed out during the holidays in order to make the family happy and/or content.

May or may not be applied directly to anal sex with the wife/girlfriend - no questions asked.
Wife: "Now that everyone is gone from Christmas dinner, did you have a good time? By the way thanks for that diamond tennis bracelet you bought me dear..."

Husband: "I'm tired, full, half drunk & horny. Time for Santa's Take!"

Wife: "What is Santa's Take?"

Husband: "Bend that rump over and I'll show you. I will be debt for the next 12 months because your kids only wear Ralph Lauren and wanted diamond nipple rings. Now it's Santa's turn... It's time for Santa's Take!"

Wife: "yes dear. (bends over somewhat willingly)

/end
Santa's Take by WillyJK December 23, 2008
Urban Dictionary Merch
Your favorite words on things you can wear, drink from, read, or give to a friend.
The Urban Dictionary Store sells gifts you’ll have to explain.

santa's little helper 

Homer Simpson's dog.
I love you Santa's Little Helper.
santa's little helper by Joe D April 23, 2005

Santa's lap 

The act of sitting on a mans lap, while having intercourse on Christmas Day (sex position where one person sits down and the other person bounces on top, creating enjoyable sex on the 25th of December)
"Dude she sat on Santa's lap at the Christmas party last night!"

santa's little helper 

a hot little booty that works for the ceo
Jimmy: Did you see the skirt on santa's little helper?
Sunny: Man, it's good to be santa, given her presents and all.
santa's little helper by Bombsky February 26, 2010

Santa's Big Red Sack

Preferably done around Christmas time. You go out and find a virgin, pop her cherry, and then paint your sack with her blood.
Hey Tom, this chick let me do Santa's Big Red Sack with her last night. It was awesome.
Santa's Big Red Sack by JayTree January 19, 2008

Santa's Stocking 

To ejaculate into somebodies sock as a practical joke
After sexing your missus,pull out and come in her sock and reply "Santa left you something from his fat sack."
Or
On your best friends mums birthday jack off into one of her socks,and reply
"Santa came early this year"
Or
Your bosses sock,friends sock,etc

Now that you know what a Santa's Stocking is, it's time to spread that Christmas joy, regardless of the time of year.
Santa's Stocking by O'Shay June 17, 2008

Santa's Secret Penguin Spy 

He is the most awesome penguin ever. Ziffle is not just any penguin. He is a secret spy sent by an agency to help keep an eye on boys and girls expecting a Christmas Eve visit from Santa Claus. Ziffle needs to know just one thing? Which children in the world are being naughty and which are being nice.

Ziffle is no elf. Armed with a cell phone with a direct line to Santa, he does not need a train, plane, or even wings to deliver his message. Ziffle can just text a name! But all the boys and girls know that if their mom or dad has to tell them twice, Ziffle has another secret spy device that allows Santa to see the entire human race from the comfort of his big chair at the North Pole.

In this enchanting holiday tale, a secret penguin spy partners with Santa to ensure that children around the world learn that it is always better to be nice than naughty!
Santa's Secret Penguin Spy is a bad bad a** like 007 style.
Hit him up at zifflebooks.com peace
More from Urban Dictionary
A dead drop is a location used to secretly pass items between two people, without requiring them to meet.

Spies have been known to use dead drops, using various techniques to hide the items and to signal that the drop has been made. Drug dealers use this as well.

A common place is to duct tape the item to the underside of a toilet cover in a public restroom.

A signal is sometimes used as well to indicate there is something to pickup, like a pile of stones in a certain formation. After checking the drop the signal is removed.
"The dead drop is the restroom toilet at the Gulf station at the corner of Commercial Ave. and Georges Rd."
dead drop by rubberroom July 23, 2008
Word of the Day on November 9, 2026

No Surprises Wedding

A "No Surprises Wedding," or NSW, is a wedding invitation designation that tells attendees that there can be no unplanned announcements, engagements, events or speeches at the wedding - all actions must be pre-approved by the couple. Anyone who performs an unapproved "surprise" will be asked to leave the wedding early.

This designation comes from Reddit, where so many stories of bad wedding behavior indicated a need to communicate expectations for the wedding behavior of attendees.
You are cordially invited to the nuptials of Brian and Tom on October 31 at noon.

Please note that this wedding is child-free (under 10) and a No Surprises Wedding (NSW). Reach out to wedding planner Sami Smith to request approvals or exceptions; please note that exceptions will be rare. Limited child care for under-10s will be available. All approvals will be noted and included in planning. Unapproved, or surprise exceptions, will result in guests being asked to leave.
Word of the Day on November 8, 2026
Ulzzang true definition is "best & "face" = best face in korean. They are basically people with above average looks, sometimes with the use of photoshop and haduri who post their pics online, some becoming internet celebrities.
"Hey, see that chick over there? She's pretty enough to be an ulzzang. :D"
ulzzang by `r i k kit t y February 26, 2008
Word of the Day on November 7, 2026
EBK stands for "Elite Ball Knowledge." 1 In internet slang, "ball knowledge" originally referred to a deep understanding of football/soccer or basketball, but it has evolved into a broader term for having a highly sophisticated, deep, or niche understanding of any specific topic (such as music, movies, or subcultures).
Person A: "That scene was a direct homage to an unreleased 1982 Japanese indie film."
Person B: "Wow, EBK."
EBK by silwhett November 5, 2026
Word of the Day on November 6, 2026
A seemingly endless debate with a idiot
I don't know man im not ready for yap trap stupidity today which always tries to suck you into it
Yap Trap by WolfieSnack November 4, 2026
Word of the Day on November 5, 2026
Texas is categorized as a swing state in presidential elections, but has voted for Republicans more times than for Democrats in recent history. As such, as demographics change political alignments, some Democrats believe that Texas will vote blue, or Democratic, due to their Hispanic and African American voters, who often align themselves with the Democratic Party's liberal wing.

Blexas has been cited as possible in the upcoming decades, but only if Democrats continue to win the Hispanic vote in bigger margins.
Democrat 1: What is your prediction for the 2024 presidential election?
Democrat 2: Well uh, Blexas!
Democrat 1: You've been saying that since 2008 though.
Blexas by Tritonist June 14, 2021
Word of the Day on November 4, 2026

briefcake 

"Did you check out the briefcake in courtroom C?"
briefcake by Ben Frey April 6, 2006
Word of the Day on November 3, 2026
Load more