caalum 

Is a bitch ass nigga that has sex with his own mom.

Fuck caalum

caalum by Killaknell May 1, 2018

calum hood 

a sensation and bodacious man in aesthetically pleasing outfits, who plays the fucking bass and radiants big dick energy.

DID YOU SEE CALUM HOOD PLAY BASS HE IS FUCKING AMAZING

calum hood by donttestmeiampunkrock July 31, 2018

Catlum 

A gender neutral term for a single head of cattle. Avoids confusion between bull and cow.

Why is that catlum standing alone in the field?

Catlum by TheRealBlueEagle October 24, 2016

Callum Machan 

AKA Cal Cal <3
The most perfect guy in existence. He has black hair and brown Asian eyes. He's a halfie, half Canada half Cantonesia. He has two gay moms that are younger than him somehow and because of it, he has a tendency to fall in love with lesbians even though he's straight and can't get with them. He's really mean to the people that care about him but deep down everyone knows he loves them. He always wears a black Thomas Sabo watch and bracelet that his fake dad gave him but sometimes his moms steal it. He's a tall Benjamin. He always has headphones on him and he's "ALWAYS FUCKING TIRED". He needs therapy and won't get it, instead, he spends his money on purple vitamin water. He also has a massive cock.

"OMG, IS THAT A CALLUM MACHAN?"
"No, he's not a cutie patootie like a real Callum!"

Callum Machan by MRNEWELL March 19, 2019

Calum Hood 

Calum Hood is in a band called 5 seconds of summer. He's so cute like a little puppy but then .4 seconds later he turns into this sexy little shit. He's so sexy he's just a ball of australian sex. He occasionally slaps the bass but I think he really means ass. He plays soccer too which is also really sexy. He has really nice lips that make you vomit. He glued a Cincinnati Reds snapback to his head. He's the only person on this planet who still looks hot while wearing an Adventure Time watch. He also thinks he's this rapper named Cash Money and he ships himself with Chris Brown.

Random: Have you heard of Calum Hood?

Me: Oh you mean Cash Money? Yea, he's in this australian band and he's so sexy.

Calum Hood by the whale's vagina June 15, 2013

Calum Hood 

The most unappreciated member of 5SOS. He's the bassist in the band- and the one who writes the most songs but isn't given enough credit. Probably the most logical and most intelligent person of the four-piece. Has ethereal melanin and needs to be protected at all costs. Isn't treated with respect and is mostly ignored, but loves the fans immensely no matter what. Likes to make people laugh and is all around a genuinely great person to be around.

Michael Clifford is whipped by Calum Hood.

Calum Hood by saudadeskies July 17, 2016

Callum’s corner 

British nonce Hunter
Who released no no noncesence
He exposes celebrities and youtubers for being nonces. He has a tic tac head

Dav alright this Callum’s corner man is well funny with us no no noncesence song

Callum’s corner by Little-willyy August 14, 2018