Shatsturbating

The act of pooping, whilst, simultaneously, masturbating. This act is best accomplished on a toilet, or toilet-esque surface.

"I ate a lot of beans, and then I shatsturbated!"

Larry: "Wow, Turner, what's that smell coming from the bathroom? It smells of quando and poopy."
Turner: "Don't blame a brothah for shatsturbating. It's natchrill."

by Jason Brown Bear January 13, 2008

shapesturbating

The act of masturbating in a crowded room (usually 4-6 people) without their knowledge, and then proceeding to dive your semen soaked hand into a pack of shapes. Afterwards, you can either wash your hands or lick the now flavor packed semen off of your fingers

Ben: Dude, did you hear what happened in Cabin 9 last night?
John: No what happened?
Ben: Apparently Xavier was shapesturbating
John: That's disgusting

by Jernandez December 3, 2016

Shatsturbation

When you masturbate while shitting, so both explode at the same time.

After last nights shatsturbation, I thought I could die happy. It was pure bliss.

by prosperoust February 4, 2009

slasturbating

masturbating in your sleep

Jimmy fell asleep with his dick in his hand and woke up with semen all over him and exclaimed, "Shit, I was slasturbating again!"

by shittydrumsalot October 26, 2009

Chatsturbating

When someone isn't very responsive on Instant Messenger because, evidently, they are masturbating.

"Matthew, why are you taking so long to reply to me?"

"I was chatsturbating..."

by Regnisab September 15, 2009

shmasturbating

The act of masturbating while taking a shit.

Johnny just came back from shmasturbating n the bathroom.

by Matthew Kessler October 22, 2013

sadsturbating

The act of masturbating while sad.

"Hey man, is Pete okay? I hear a lot of crying and bed-squeaking in his room."
"Nah man, his girlfriend just broke up with him. He's probably sadsturbating."

by BMasterTempt May 17, 2015