A Martard is a delusional blonde who thinks that lightning will strike twice in the form of
2 Stanley Cup visits to the state of
California. Martards are easily distinguished by their shameless love of Arricks and their pleasing demeanor. When you encounter a Martard, leave them in their natural environment as picking them up
may cause other Martards to no longer recognize them and even go so far as to disown them. Martards are a fragile bunch and although they are stunningly
cute, they do not make good pets. Injured Martards should immediately be given 6 bottles of
beer and released in the nearest Octopus-free body of
water.
Although the word was originally believed to have been made to taunt a pretty girl who had an unnatural obsession with Patrick "No Show" Marleau, recent rumors place the origin of this word closer to an individual'
s obsession with Mustard.
You
silly Martard, get off my nuts!
Oh Martard, you make me giggle.
Oh no! That Martard just got flattened by Kronwall!
Watch out Martard, there'
s Ducks in that
water! QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK.