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To receive a blow job while having a shit.
As it's your birthday today I'll give you a blumke as a special treat.
Blumke by Qabbalah September 18, 2020
Words you can keep
When you get a blowjob whilst you're having a shit.
"Mitch is in the doghouse again."
"why? What's happened?"

"He asked Kerri Anne for a blumke."
Blumke by Kinneth September 17, 2020
Related Words
When your wife has a three way with a Nigerian and a pit bull
I had a friend once. His wife would Blumke him every time she went to Vegas
Blumke by MattJGoaltender69 January 22, 2020

tarmac blumke 

To defecate on your partner's chest, and smear the excrement into their chest with your bottom, while they perform oral sex
She's a 1, but she's up for a tarmac blumke

Upper Dutch Blumkin 

the combination of an

Upper Decker (Pooping in the tank)
Dutch Oven (Farting - then pulling the covers over your partner's head)
and a Blumkin (Getting a blowjob while taking a dump)

In other words - Pooping in the tank while getting a blowjob with a towel over the blowjob giver's head

this is a class move - only performed at major burns (like Burning Man) or in Northern Virginia to settle a blood feud
I thought it was just an upper decker - but the fucker left a picture of my Mom giving him an upper dutch blumkin

blumperbating

Are you kidding dude? Blumperbating's the best!
blumperbating by Baker146 January 13, 2011
A blog lurker. Someone who reads a lot of blogs but never posts any comments.
I stopped posting to my LJ because all my readers were blurkers.
blurker by Webster114 December 9, 2008
More from Urban Dictionary

Coyote Ugly

1. Place

The Bar came before the movie. It is an awesome bar where the girls know how to party and make you feel okay about giving up your money, drawers, bras, and dignity.

2. Movie

A story about a Jersey girl following her dreams, aided by working at this bar in New York.

3. Situation/Person/Decision

See other definitions - waking up next to someone so ugly you'd rather chew your arm off than wake them up.
1. Yo, Coyote Ugly is my favorite bar! I got whipped, stripped, drunk, and danced on the bar all before 7 o'clock!

2. Hey did you see Coyote Ugly? It actually has a plot!

3. Ugg I woke up to Coyote Ugly this morning!
Coyote Ugly by jerseycountry March 8, 2009
Word of the Day on September 2, 2026

Literally 1984 

Used in response for when someone promotes/advocates an event or idea that is perceived to support "too much" authority and/or government control.

Often used jokingly as a over-exaggeration in political talk.

Can also be used in response to a ban or mute in a forum site or online chat.
Steve: I think that the government should regulate businesses more
Bob: Literally 1984!

--User1 has been permantly banned--
User2: You cant ban my friend like that! Literally 1984!
Literally 1984 by ke1 July 7, 2021
Word of the Day on September 1, 2026

Back when I lived in upstate new york 

A meaningless, unimpressive, self-serving introduction. An indicator that the story about to be shared will be pointless and dumb.
Back when I lived in upstate new york, I also had to park on the street - on two occasions, we got enough snow, mixed with just the right plowing, that my car was lifted off the ground from so much snow being jammed underneath it.
Word of the Day on August 31, 2026
Acronym, meaning Too Long Didn't Understand
Similar to TLDR
Sister: This meeting was to discuss the rough draft of my essay, where we discussed the subsidiary questions I added in my rough draft. We also discussed the relationship between my main title and the real-life situations I chose to use in my essay. We discussed the structure of my essay as well, specifically the Math AOK section and how it relates to the contradiction of the title. This second meeting was particularly helpful in discussing the implications of my essay claims and how to apply the title across various areas of knowledge. There were many sections of the essay that could have been cut down in wordiness and the ways of knowing required further and more in-depth analysis.

Me: Woah! TLDU!
TLDU by L-Evans January 14, 2019
Word of the Day on August 30, 2026
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