How did we get here? I know, you're at school, you're horny, all the good sites are blocked, but searching this up on Urban Dictionary of all places? Really?
Don't search up blowjob on Urban Dictionary.
by Lord Quasar November 11, 2020
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the act of sucking and using your tongue to pleasure a guy's dick.

proper blowjob etiquette/procedure:
1.) start out with a little teasing, by stroking him off a few times, but then, unbutton his pants with your teeth. this'll make you seem like an animal, and that's exactly what you want him to think.
2.) start out by swirling your tongue around the head of his dick for 10-15 seconds, alternating between up-and-down and all around. this also gets your saliva going, because yanno, who wants a dry beejay?

3.) work your way deeper and deeper while stroking him off with one or both hands, and move your head up and down.
4.) massage his balls with your free hand.
5.) make sure to hit the area right under the head. (pleasure nerves, people.)
6.) glide your teeth lightly up and down his shaft once or twice, just to give him a tingly feeling.
7.) make eye contact, but make it devilish eye contact. don't look up at him like a dying puppy.
8.) if he says he's about to cum, speed your pace up a little bit and go as deep as you can without puking, and when he cums, slowly inch your mouth back up and swallow. lick off any excess.
9.) spitters are quitters. come on, girls. it's just salty.
and THAT, my friends, is a blowjob.
Dude, Joanne gave me the best blowjob last night. I thought I was gonna blow through the roof.
by lyssaalltimelow February 03, 2014
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When a mobster orders you to plant explosives to a gangsters property in an act of revenge.If the bastard is a traitor,thieve or rat then give him a blowjob. You can blowjob a car, a house or somebody's wife.
Big Vennie:" Hey Frankie, that bastard Luigi boy owes me $20,000 in cocaine. Go to his place at night when he is in bed and give his ferrari a blowjob!

Frankie: "Alright boss." (plants explosives, then bang!)

Luigi boy: " mamma mia!"
by topmountain August 18, 2010
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1. The act of forcing open a bank vault or safe with the use of explosives.
2. In a gang of criminals, the person who is in charge of explosives.
1. Dragon Lady said she wasn't looking for a wheel man right now, but maybe she might need a blowjob later this month.

2. "If you ever need a blowjob," said Lefty, "Dynamite Dinah's the girl to go to."
by Sklooby March 16, 2008
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Sucking sensation on the penis for an orgasm.
Matt heard his mom shut the door behind her. He raced to the utility closet and got out the vacuum cleaner. He quickly took off his pants and boxers. His penis felt the fresh air. Matt had a boner. He plugged in the vacuum and switched it on.

He jammed his dick and ballsack into the nozzle and felt it suck. The setting was in the middle. He felt pleasure throughout his body. The blowjob felt amazing. He moaned and groaned. His penis became heavily coated with precum. He felt the head become heavy and swollen.

He let out a moan as he released jizz all inside the nozzle. Pleasure tingled in his cock. His penis let out lots of cum. He then decided to put it on maximum. It was so good. His cock and ballsack were covered with jizz and he loved the hard suck.

He became flaccid, and the vacuum cleaner was still sucking, so Matt went to switch it off. He was too far from the switch, so he tried taking out his penis. The vacuum cleaner was too strong. His balls started to ache. His penis was being stretched so much, it hurt. Cold air rushed and hit his balls. His genitals were being sucked on so hard, they were stuck. He fell to the ground, unable to get up.

He was stuck for about an hour now, and his balls were hurting so bad. His dick was numb and flaccid. He was trapped in the blowjob. His testicles were red and blotchy. His genitals were droopy and semen covered. The vacuum cleaner didn’t stop sucking. It even felt as it sucked harder every minute.
by Well, shit. December 22, 2017
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what the hell?!?!? What kind of pervert are you to look up blowjob?!?! go get a life. Seriously.
go geta life and stop looking up blowjob in the internet pervs.
by killerzofall April 06, 2010
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what i will never ever do to anyone because its fucking nasty
that shitbag asked me for a blowjob
by Erin March 02, 2005
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