wankt

A particular pathetic and uninspired state of misery.

Applicable to many situations.
Often surfacing through a combination of misserable circumstances like deceptive expectations and the aftermath of intoxication.

For instance:
Friends that haven't seen eachother in a long time agree to spend a weekend together in beautiful, interesting, lively and inspirational city.
Arrowsed already weeks before they arrive ready for action.
They end up doing nothing at all but sit in the same shity bar complaining about all and everything and doing nothing about it.

> Eh brew, this whole city is pretty wankt, innit...
> Bro, this is a pretty wankt weekend, eh...

by E. W. Maximus March 4, 2017

wisdom wank

The act of masturbating in order to gain clear insight into a troubling decision or situation.

Bro, I wanted to cheat on her, but after my wisdom wank, I was fine.

by teaseit August 5, 2014

Sad Wank

To go home after a bad night out or other disheartening event and console ones self by sitting in the dark and having a wank. Also know as pulling a Joni or an SW. ( crying optional but recommended)

Just got knocked back by a blind midget... I'm going home for a sad wank.

by The Marine Scientist November 12, 2013

cyber danger wank

Rubbing one out under the desk during a Zoom meeting. Simply put, choking the chicken down low while being professional up top.

Ashley- “Did you see Matt’s arm shaking during the Zoom”?

David- “I’ll bet the over he was doing a cyber danger wank”.

by Hucklebucker September 29, 2020

wank bollocks

really bad thing

oh mate thats totally wank bollocks

by wankbollocks December 7, 2021

Wank Royal

A wank with a Johnny on. The kind of wank you treat yourself to have, you don't have it everyday because its the 'royal' treatment.

Adapted from the inbetweeners - Neil, if the pressures ever to much you can borrow one of my johnnys and have a wank royal. A what? You know a wank royal, a wank with a johnny on.

by smackmyass August 27, 2013

wank twist

Someone who twisted their cock.

John: hey you wank twist!

by Johnbread January 2, 2021