timeshite 

The art of documenting what your boss wanted you to do for the week, rather than what you actually did

Bob submitted to his boss his weekly timeshite.

timeshite by Tim G NZ August 2, 2006

Timeshare 

See time share time-share.

An elaborate marketing scam designed to make victims purchase property that they don't really need. Typically this scam is used in vacation/resort towns like Williamsburg, Myrtle Beach, Las Vegas, and Orlando. After being lured to the places with offers of "Free Disney Tickets" or "Free Money", victims are made to endure a 90-120 minute sales presentation where they are shown around a series of semi-luxurious condos or apartments, and then persuaded to purchase a property using deceptive and highly-pressurized sales pitches.

After being shown around a fairly nice-looking apartment complex, the Timeshare salesman and the customer return to the main office to finalize the presentation.

Timeshare Rep: So, did you like the Quazi Glam properties?
Customer: Absolutely! The jacuzzi room was a nice touch, and the ocean view is spectacular.
Timeshare Rep: Now, I need to get my double-digit sales quota today, and I'm running terribly short on time, so let's get down to business. You said you are an Engineer, and you probably make like a shitload of money, so how would you like to purchase an apartment for $2,899 a month for 60 months?
Customer: Those apartments don't look like they cost that much!
Timeshare Rep: Aw come on now, work with me. (scribbles on a paper) Using a hooey mathematical formula I made up while showing you around, you can easily get one paid off in like, 14 months.
Customer: The price still does not justify the quality.
Timeshare Rep: Hmmm. How about I reduce the payment to $2,199 for 54 months. You can even invite your friends and relatives to rent it out and reduce your cost.
Customer: Let me think about it later.
Timeshare Rep: Okay. How about $1,799 for 48 months? I'll even throw in free maintenance and free lunches at the on-site bistro for 3 months.
Customer: I still need more time to consider this.
Timeshare Rep: You're breaking my balls here. $1,499 for 42 months, plus all of the benefits, and free heating?
Customer: Alright, fine. I'll buy an apartment.
Timeshare Rep: Great! Now sign on the dotted line before my 100 minute presentation is up (hands over a document).
Customer: (signng the document) Now what if I change my mind and decide to cancel my payment, do I get refunded?
Timeshare Rep: Um.....no. In fact, by signing up, you are now required to pay $2,899 up front, plus a $7,345 utility instalation fee, $13,500 pet-chauffer service, and a $1,766 asteroid-impact insurance fee.
Customer: Fuck.
Timeshare Rep: Thank you for purchasing a Quazi Glam property. Here's a complementary ticket to Jamal's Flea Market. Have a nice day. Sucker.

Timeshare by sarcastic June 11, 2006

Timethief 

Someone who is always late, meaning they are constantly steeling other people's time and wasting other people's lives.

You're five hours late! That's five hours of my life I'm never getting back you timethief!

Timethief by Rikstir July 31, 2015

pussy timeshare 

To have full knowledge of and full agreement with a buddy to share in the sexual promiscuousness of a said female

Yo man, I thought some drama was gonna go down after she hooked up with both our roommates. But they worked it out and now they have a pussy timeshare

pussy timeshare by Iron Butterfly 91 October 28, 2011

Timethief 

An annoying internet Troll who hides behind many anonymous fake avatars, otherwise known as the invisible copy & paste buffoon. She seems to think everyone else is wrong and she alone is right but first she has to run a Google search so she doesn't sound like she doesn't know what the hell she's talking about. After all she has to keep face in the community. Definitely an old dried up wrinkled faced woman, who's days of youth are gone and now waste her time trying to compete with women half her age. Just randomly name any country in the world and she'll tell you she visited or vacationed there too. Yet everyone already realizes she doesn't know shit.

timethief
timesuck
timewaste

Timethief by xena777 December 11, 2011

ghetto timeshare 

the act of buying something and splitting the cost with a friend or group of friends when the cost is under $100, and the group plans to share the item equally

$40 webcam, splitting $20 a piece, alternating possession every week is a ghetto timeshare

ghetto timeshare by Bob k. garf June 24, 2010

Timeshitting 

Timesheeting at a public toilet. When a public toilet cleaner ticks off their daily assigned tasks at regular intervals, while reporting any defect or breakdown, on a washroom inspection card.

The poor sanitary conditions at most public toilets worldwide shows that most janitors pay lip service to timeshitting, who are often pissed off by the inconsiderate behaviors of some members of the public, such as squatting with their dirty shoes on the toilet bowl, failing to flush the toilet after use, and stealing toilet rolls.

Timeshitting by Fasters January 26, 2022