Rikstir's definitions

Glastontory

Glastontory

I person who believes attending the Capitalist money making project called the Glastonbury Festival, makes them in some way; new age, green, liberal, open minded, or relevant.

Glastontories are the most phoney people on the planet. They will spend three days at the festival telling everyone how green they are, and then leave their tent and all their rubbish for someone else to clear up, because they’re just too lazy and ignorant to do it themselves. They will tell everyone at the festival how passionate they are about the homeless, but once they get back to the real world, they will walk past street people, like they’re from another planet. They will tell everyone about their boundless social conscience, whilst never actually contributing anything to planet Earth or the human race, except: waste, pollution, and unneeded children that will grow up to be just as ignorant, as they are.

I can remember when festivals were about music: Now everyone at them is a Glastontory.

by Rikstir August 22, 2019

Bullshit Baffles Brains

Although the other definitions make sense, I've always associated a different meaning to this term. Bullshit Baffles Brains is a military term, I first heard it in the army thirty years ago. Rather than an attempt to deceive a third party, it is a description of the way the officers (management) and procedures are so filled with unnecessary and pointless bullshit, that they defy all logic and the fact that our glorious leaders had totally bought into that bullshit.

They want use to parade for the combat exercise in our best uniforms and change into our battle gear once we get into the field, talk about bullshit baffles brains.

by Rikstir April 28, 2017

Loony Left

Left Wing political policies or ideas that are utterly ridiculous and absurd to the point that only a lunatic could possibly think they were in any way valid.

Labour had no chance of getting elected under Kinock, he was from the Loony Left.

by Rikstir August 28, 2015

Society Of The Lowest Common Denominator

The Society of The Lowest Common Denominator is a term I invented for the end result of Socialism and Politically Correct Pseudo Interllectual Fascism. It describes a society where everyone is condemed to the level of the slowest, weakest, most interlectually inadiquate and emotionally crippled.

You can't give an honest opinion on fedd back forms in case someone is offended? Talk about the society of the lowest common denominator!

by Rikstir October 28, 2013

I couldn't give a flying monkey's arsehole

The combination of two English exclamations, in order to give extra gravitas to the fact that you don't care.

I couldn't give a flying fuck, and I couldn't give a monkey's arsehole.

Karen says she's offended, well I couldn't give a flying monkey's arsehole.

by Rikstir May 30, 2025

The Woke Folk

The Woke Folk are predominantly; white, middle class, and relatively wealthy. These people are so utterly obsessed with how other people see them: That they spend their whole lives virtue signalling, and engaging in fashion statement politics. They are so determined to present themselves as; progressive, altruistic, and outraged by injustice: They will jump onto any and every, pseudo political bandwagon, the mainstream media, and education system tell them to.

Still trying to explain reality to the Woke Folk: Talk about flogging a dead horse.

by Rikstir August 18, 2020

you'll get splinters

A derogatory rebuff to someone who is constantly sitting on the fence.

Grow some balls and form an opinion or you'll get splinters.

by Rikstir February 4, 2014