Rikstir's definitions

I couldn't give a flying monkey's arsehole

The combination of two English exclamations, in order to give extra gravitas to the fact that you don't care.

I couldn't give a flying fuck, and I couldn't give a monkey's arsehole.

Karen says she's offended, well I couldn't give a flying monkey's arsehole.

by Rikstir May 30, 2025

Nielmail

A Nielmail is an email from a manager that has no relevant information on it, it is probably sent to the wrong inbox.

Nielmails are essentially a way to kick the can down the road, and hope someone else will pick it up and deal with it.

Named after a Peckham Street Urchin made good.

I had to spend an hour sorting out that Nielmail, and it wasn't even for our department!

by Rikstir January 17, 2025

Chavert

A chavert is an action or behaviour, that exposes someone to be less educated and or cultured than the persona they are presenting to the world.

A very common example is, adding SELF to the ends of words erroneously. Saying myself, yourself, or themselves, when you should be saying, me, you, and them. Is a sure fire way to display that you are pretending to be better educated than you actually are.

That bell end is wearing £1,000.00 trainers, but his children haven't even got beds to sleep in: massive chavert.

by Rikstir January 9, 2025

The Great aWOKening

An constructed act of social engineering, designed to convince people that they have woken up by taking the red pill, when in fact, they have taken an extra large blue pill, and are now actively trying to keep everyone else asleep and plugged into the matrix.

You never had a thought in your head, until someone taught you to be WOKE. Now it's actually worse, you have adopted the narrative and everything you thing is the total opposite of the truth. It's the great aWOKening. You and your friends should pay each other on the back. 🤦

by Rikstir January 1, 2024

WOKE

Originally dating back to at least the 1940s, an African American grammatical error, used to mean AWAKE, in a political sense.

Unheard of in the UK until the BLM movement spread over here in the late 2010s.

Then hijacked by middle class pseudo Socialists, as a virtue signal.

Now used as an insult, to point out just how moronic and out of touch those people are.

WOKE is like COOL, if you think you are, you're defiantly not.

That WOKE twat thinks men can have babies.

by Rikstir August 30, 2023

WOKE

originally an African American grammatical error, dating back to at least the 1940s, meaning AWAKE in a political sense. In the 2010s Black Lives Matter (BLM), introduced it to a wider audience. It was immediately misappropriated by white middle class pseudo intellectuals, and used as a virtue signal. The irony being that the people who claimed they were WOKE were always the least AWAKE.

Now used as an insult to describe people that don't have any knowledge or understanding of any socio-political concepts (except that which is drip fed to them by the main stream media and education system), but like to make a lot of noise and trouble for everyone else. Cancel culture is WOKE, political correctness is WOKE, things that don't exist like, white privilege and systemic racism are WOKE ideas, critical race theory and critical queer theory, are both WOKE.

To use an example from the film The Matrix. WOKE people are those that took the blue pill but have convinced themselves that the took the red pill.

by Rikstir May 3, 2023

How's your bum for spots?

A traditional English greeting that literally means "How are you?".

Alright Treacle, how's your bum for spots?

by Rikstir June 24, 2022