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Telefunken u47 

a metaphor for a large dildo. it refers to the u47 microphone made by the German company called Telefunken, it was originally used by Frank Zappa in his album Joe's garage. the cylindrical shape plus the fact that the name sounds like fucken you, lend to the humor
Larry: we got a present for you

marry: what is it, what are you ganna give me
Larry: it looks just like a Telefunken u47... you'll love it
marry: with leather?

Telecentric 

Adjective.
1. Having a television as the focal point or most important part.
2. Designed for optimum viewing of a television.
Jack noticed that the the couches in the living room were facing each other and the TV was in the corner, thus failing to make the room telecentric.
Telecentric by Rat Fink August 5, 2008

Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder 

Unlike Truman Show Delusion sufferers who see themselves as being the unwitting main character in a reality TV show, Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder sufferers see their life as being full-blown scripted, expensive serialised drama TV Series. They frame each year of their life as being a 'season', each week roughly equating to a single 'episode' of their show.

The sufferer twists known facts and does mental gymnastics to shoehorn their mundane lives into some form of 'season arc' for their character.

They know full well that they aren't really in a TV show. - they just desperately want to be.

Ultimately, Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder is just a tactic employed by the miserable to deny reality - those who know deep down that the only way their life can have meaning is not through art or expression, giving and charity, a relationship with God but instead by forcibly contextualising everything as being a carefully scripted, story-boarded and rehearsed piece of fiction to be consumed by only the sufferer themselves.

The sufferer inevitably commits suicide or dies in their 'series finale' - Whether their TV Series achieved excellence and a satisfactory conclusion (Breaking Bad), was cancelled before its time and fondly remembered (Party Down), went seasons too long and became a shadow of itself (The Simpsons), (Dexter) can only be determined by the dead sufferer's friends and family at the funeral.
Q; "What's wrong with Caleb? He said he hadn't seen me since 'Season 2', and that he thought I'd been written out, whatever that means?

A: "Dude yeah he's got Telefantastic Dissociative Delusional Disorder' - just nod and smile. He'll kill himself if he thinks his show might be getting cancelled or resorting to cheap plot twists"

TELEMENTATION 

The art of altering reality through your deepest level of conciousness ("Feeling mass"), a variation of the law of attraction, with the exception that it actually works.
Telementation is the art of Creating an event or physical object, manifesting a desired outcome in your life or in the life of others (can only be used for positive things and never contradict free will, (well you could try and see for yourself what the consequenses are..)
TELEMENTATION by Noh D.Bates October 26, 2011

Telekenesis 

Literally, to move something from a distance (tele meaning from a distance, kenesis meaning motion).
I have the power of telekenesis, so i threw a car at my sister.

I pushed a ball with a stick which, by defintion, is telekenesis.
Telekenesis by mercethemerciless November 23, 2009

Telekenesis 

The ability to move, pick-up, or otherwise manipulate an object with ones mind.
Telekenesis is featured well in the game "Psi-Ops".