The term given to an ugg-wearing, pumpkin-spice-loving white girl who 'literally can't even' after being deprived of Starbucks for a prolonged (probably 24 hours) period of time.
Oh my gosh! The poor girl is like, dying of starbation. Quick, get her a pumpkin spicelatte!
A jealousy-induced form of regretful masturbation; usually occurs after one realizes their ex no longer wants them and/or after seeing them "getting it in" with a new lover.
Dude is Devin crying? ...Dude is Devin masturbating? Oh Shit! That poor bastard's cry-sturbating!
After seeing his ex playing tonsil hockey with her new man at the superbowl party, Devin scampered away to his room for an all night session of loud & painfully pleasant cry-sturbation.