cryptosmite

Exploit made by Writable that Osama has possession of

Yoo U got that new CryptoSmite USB?

by osamason January 20, 2024

cryptosmite

an unenrollment exploit for chromebooks developed by the team FWSmasher over on GitHub around March 2024
Google paid 10k to the developer after they kept quiet waiting for it (bug report) to be patched, unlike sh1mmer....

student 1: why dude I cant go discord.com it say "blocked"?
student 2: just use cryptosmite LOL
student 2: I don't have any restrictions on my chromebook
student 2: here give me a few minutes
student 2: *crypto smites*
student 1: omg policy are you there? (the Chromebook is now unmanaged and there is no policy so they are free to do whatever)

principal: BOTH OF YOU WILL BE EXPELLED FROM THIS SCHOOL IMMEDIATELY.

by anonymous May 9, 2024

cryptosmite

an unenrollment exploit for chromebooks developed by the team FWSmasher over on GitHub around March 2024
Google paid 10k to the developer after they kept quiet waiting for it (bug report) to be patched, unlike sh1mmer....

student 1: why dude I cant go discord.com it say "blocked"?
student 2: just use cryptosmite LOL
student 2: I don't have any restrictions on my chromebook
student 2: here give me a few minutes
student 2: *crypto smites*
student 1: omg policy are you there? (the Chromebook is now unmanaged and there is no policy so they are free to do whatever)

principal: BOTH OF YOU WILL BE EXPELLED FROM THIS SCHOOL IMMEDIATELY.

by therealmia May 9, 2024

cryptonite

Can refer to either of two similarly-"weighty" definitions:
(1) Any complicated/intricate strategy --- such as using disappearing ink, light-sensitive/chemically-treated "disintegrating" paper that quickly becomes illegible, the addition/insertion of one or more confusing/misleading codes, etc --- that heavily "drags down" anyone's attempts to read/decipher an encryption.
(2) The amalgam of minerals used to make a special stone vault for human-burial purposes.

Our founding fathers surely doled out huge healthy doses of cryptonite in their efforts to prevent thieves from locating/accessing their "national treasure"; fortunately Benjamin Gates and his intrepid colleagues managed to de-code everything in time to prevent said treasure from falling into the wrong hands.

by QuacksO November 18, 2018

cryptonite

Substance postulated by scientists to describe a new quality of altcoin prices plummeting, since lead proved to be an insufficient analogy.

Yesterday my pockets were full of digital cash. Over night it all turned to cryptonite. Better go for some crypternating.

by celebrity_chef June 5, 2018

Cryptonite

A crystal that vibrates and resonates with 2.4ghz and low frequencies that mimics radiation from the sun. Produced inside a nuclear fungus (radiotrophic) that produces carbon nanotubes to attenuate frequencies and guide it's spores into hyphae by protein into your neurons by the lymphatic system so that it can continuously reproduce cryptonite in the brain.

It demands to be fueled by carbon sources like alcohol and can mind control.

The fungus is called cryptococcus. Hence crypto-nite.

"Dear God I lost all my powers and am too weak. I must have been poisoned by Cryptonite!"

by El Kal El February 2, 2019

Cryptocrite

Somebody who owns crypto currency but votes and acts against crypto’s fundamental purpose.

Dick is such a cryptocrite. He owns a lot of bitcoin but believes that the government should control the banks and be centralized. Fucking cryptocrite.

by Hankscorpio74 March 6, 2021