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Carnilingus
I thought the officer would think it was awesome that she crashed the car while I was giving her Carnilingus, and he would just let us off the hook. He didn't. Still, she said it was totally worth it.
Carnilingus by A friend of the internets April 18, 2009
Related Words
Carnation Instant Bitch
A breakast meal that allows the person consuming it to be transformed almost instantly into a raging bitch.
Carnation Instant Bitch by Debate December 24, 2007
Carcation
Vacation taken with your car, in which the car is the main reason for the trip, ie car show, bikini car wash marathon, trip to pick up parts.
Looks like a vacation to an unsuspecting person, but really a ploy to drive all over creation to visit car lovers places, such as car shows, car museums, and car auctions.
Looks like a vacation to an unsuspecting person, but really a ploy to drive all over creation to visit car lovers places, such as car shows, car museums, and car auctions.
Guy1: "So what are you doing this weekend?"
Guy2: Taking The Girlfriend To Key West
Guy1: YOU ARE SO WHIPPED!!
Guy2: Nope There's A Gathering OF The Stangs
Guy1: Aww Man I Wanna Go On A Carcation!!!
Guy2: Taking The Girlfriend To Key West
Guy1: YOU ARE SO WHIPPED!!
Guy2: Nope There's A Gathering OF The Stangs
Guy1: Aww Man I Wanna Go On A Carcation!!!
Carcation by squirreltoucher4ever February 14, 2012
Protein Carnation
A crumpled wad of toilet or tissue paper containing any of a variety of sexual fluids (semen, vaginal secretions, et al) and resembling a freshly blossomed carnation.
Whenever my girlfriend and I have sex, a garden of protein carnations invariably end up at the foot of the bed.
Protein Carnation by Ocram April 27, 2003
Contextual Cognition
The process of recognizing and reacting to circumstances that are relevant to an event. It is taken so much for granted by humans that computers, and those who design them, seem stupid by comparison, when they fail to perform this process.
Some clues for making computers perform contextual cognition:
1. The more repeatedly the user strikes a particular keyboard key or clicks on an interface button before the computer performs the function assigned to that key or button, the more likely it is the user wants the computer to perform the function already, instead of what ever it's messing around with right now.
2. If the user continues repeatedly striking a particular keyboard key or clicking an interface button after the computer performed the function, this would be a good time to check and see whether the computer actually performed the function.
3. A user who clicks a window's title bar, while that window is in the background, doesn't want the window re-sized. He wants it to come to the foreground, and if he's done so several times, he's becoming impatient about it.
4. When a user repeats the same instruction to the computer that he gave several minutes ago, and the computer hasn't complied with it yet, the user doesn't need to be informed that two instances of that function cannot be performed at the same time. He simply needs to be reminded that he already gave that instruction. Better yet, since the computer has messed around so long that the user forgot that he already gave the instruction, this would be a good time to comply with it.
5. When an application window freezes up, its application is waiting for something else to happen. If the computer has enough resources to tell the user that the application is not responding, it has enough resources to determine what the application is waiting for and remind it to happen.
6. The user wants his typing and mouse clicks applied to the interface that was on the screen when he started typing or clicking, not to the window that popped up in front of it, so apply them to the intended interface and put back the work the user had in the popped-up window before the computer replaced it with the input meant for the previous window.
7. When the computer pops up an alert stating that a function aborted because the Internet connection has failed, and the alert only offers the choices to Work Offline and Try Again, and the user has tried several times to restore the Internet connection, don't wait until the user chooses "Try Again", to admit that the computer is already connected to the Internet. The user is waiting until the computer connects to the Internet before choosing "Try Again", because it would be senseless to try again without a connection to the Internet. It would also be nice if the computer identified which function aborted.
8. When the computer reconnects to the Internet after being disconnected, and the computer has enough awareness of that fact to react to it by alerting the user at that very moment that various functions failed due to the disconnection, then the computer has enough information that it could just as easily retry those functions at that time, instead of blathering at the user about it.
9. MyCrudSoft sWindles XP Procrastinal!!! What the heck do you mean, Keyboard failure Strike the F1 key to continue..."? Who do you think you are? MS-DOS 3.0? Grow up, already!
1. The more repeatedly the user strikes a particular keyboard key or clicks on an interface button before the computer performs the function assigned to that key or button, the more likely it is the user wants the computer to perform the function already, instead of what ever it's messing around with right now.
2. If the user continues repeatedly striking a particular keyboard key or clicking an interface button after the computer performed the function, this would be a good time to check and see whether the computer actually performed the function.
3. A user who clicks a window's title bar, while that window is in the background, doesn't want the window re-sized. He wants it to come to the foreground, and if he's done so several times, he's becoming impatient about it.
4. When a user repeats the same instruction to the computer that he gave several minutes ago, and the computer hasn't complied with it yet, the user doesn't need to be informed that two instances of that function cannot be performed at the same time. He simply needs to be reminded that he already gave that instruction. Better yet, since the computer has messed around so long that the user forgot that he already gave the instruction, this would be a good time to comply with it.
5. When an application window freezes up, its application is waiting for something else to happen. If the computer has enough resources to tell the user that the application is not responding, it has enough resources to determine what the application is waiting for and remind it to happen.
6. The user wants his typing and mouse clicks applied to the interface that was on the screen when he started typing or clicking, not to the window that popped up in front of it, so apply them to the intended interface and put back the work the user had in the popped-up window before the computer replaced it with the input meant for the previous window.
7. When the computer pops up an alert stating that a function aborted because the Internet connection has failed, and the alert only offers the choices to Work Offline and Try Again, and the user has tried several times to restore the Internet connection, don't wait until the user chooses "Try Again", to admit that the computer is already connected to the Internet. The user is waiting until the computer connects to the Internet before choosing "Try Again", because it would be senseless to try again without a connection to the Internet. It would also be nice if the computer identified which function aborted.
8. When the computer reconnects to the Internet after being disconnected, and the computer has enough awareness of that fact to react to it by alerting the user at that very moment that various functions failed due to the disconnection, then the computer has enough information that it could just as easily retry those functions at that time, instead of blathering at the user about it.
9. MyCrudSoft sWindles XP Procrastinal!!! What the heck do you mean, Keyboard failure Strike the F1 key to continue..."? Who do you think you are? MS-DOS 3.0? Grow up, already!
Contextual Cognition by Downstrike December 28, 2005
More from Urban Dictionary
countrypolitan
Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
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Witch Bath
A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
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kinktober
An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.
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proper lad
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womp
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.