begans

A word you say when you try to swallow pecants while you talk

Me: “I like those begans.”
Chloe: “Say it again, please.”
Me: “Excuse me, I was just swallowing the pecans I had in my mouth while I was telling you that I like them.”

by bluestinger66 July 6, 2023

the beans are talkin’

an admittance of flatulence

Husband: Did you…? Oh my gosh!
Wife: (embarrassed) Yeah, the beans are talkin’.
Husband: Well, you could have...
Wife: (indignant) I DID, but YOU just had to have curry. Actions have consequences.

by goose_on_a_roof October 18, 2020

Before my life began (BMLB)

Before my life began (BMLB) is from the “going full common playbook” of things a man can say when he is about to drop to one knee and put a ring on it! This phrase is also used when writing one’s own wedding vows to negate all of the “macking” you perpetrated before you met your wife — especially if old lovers are at the wedding and you want to throw a final elbow or two in their general direction. To use this phrase and sell it it, you must be at least 75% sincere AND say it with a straight face! After all you did invite ex’s to the wedding to make a point, didn’t you?

Him: Baby, none of them matter! That all happened before my life began (BMLB)
Her: Oh! When was that?
Him: When we finally surrendered to each other and fell in love

Now if you’re reading this and think it’s corny then you can’t pull it off. And if you can pull this off then go full Common and write your own vows because at some point you kissed the Blarney Stone!

by Mind Hunter the Profiler April 27, 2022

Beansworth

A saucy creature who dwells in the northern regions of California. The Beansworth possesses many majestic powers, some of which include gracing the backs of weary travelers in need of healing with its gentle caress and shrieking to the sounds of "Crystal Blue Persuasion" and Minnie Riperton. The Beansworth enjoys concocting delicious treats for its nieces and lounging about in the negligee. The Beansworth is not alone in its endeavors, however for when there are reported Beansworth citing (a rare and momentous occasion for it is a stealthy, nocturnal mammal) it is often seen with its bearded companion known as the gruncle and a small, uni-balled beast with an under bite. The Beansworth may seem like a busy creature, but it still recognizes the value of relaxation from time to time. In moments of stress, the Beansworth will either venture to its backyard to dip itself in the swamps or luxuriate with preferred fine wines and cheeses. Don't be alarmed if you ever cross paths with this magnificent beast, for it means no harm. In fact, ready yourself for a warm embrace and a kiss. For that is how the Beansworth greets visitors, without fail. But be warned, the Beansworth does has an evil side. Never turn your back on it or it could be hell to pay.

Girl 1: OMG GUYS I SWEAR I JUST SAW A BEANSWORTH!!

Girl 2: wow! I've heard the legends, but never have I laid eyes on one! Was it as great as I imagine??

Girl 1: Even better. *stares off into distance, dramatic background music playing softly*

by Beansworth Watcher August 16, 2012

Bro beans

This a nickname you call someone close and dear to you! This is only used for your inner circle or friends or significant other

Boy: hey bro beans, what cooking?

Girlfriend: *sits on a heated couch*

Girlfriend: warming up you snack bro beans

by Mudbonic plague October 19, 2020

hitting beans

a term used by people who actively self harm, used to describe cutting deep enough to expose the layer of fat underneath the skin. named after the fact that the bubbles of fat resemble beans.

"i don't get why people brag about hitting beans."
"i managed to hit beans before, but i had to get stitches afterwards so it wasn't really worth it."

by basedmarimo March 30, 2021

this nigga eating beans

When you spill beans all over yourself while watching Cars 2, a black teenager will shout, "This nigga eating beans."

"I spilled baked beans all over myself watching Cars 2 in the theater & a black teenager shouted, "This nigga eating beans" & everyone laughed."

by RubbaDucca July 8, 2018