Spirometer

A handheld mirror used for viewing the gouch area or taint.

That dude needs to check his spirometer homes. His junk is whack, yo.

by Woodcock89 March 3, 2018

spermometer

Male genitalia; the penis

Man: Can I stick my spermometer in your downstairs turkey, see how hot it is?

by Lizard_Queen July 12, 2007

spidometr

Semi-jocularly, Russian university students' slang for an AIDS test. The word puns on "SPID", pronounced "speed", the Russian acronym for AIDS, and English "speedometer".

My nuzhen spidometr. (Translation: We need the "SPIDometer".)

by pentozali November 19, 2007

Shitometer

The level of shit a bloke gets into with his wife. Generally occurs after a night out on the booze with his mates and he gets home very very late.

Shitometer readings -

10/10 - roaring, you are in the doghouse!

5/10 - usually still at this level 5 days after peaking at 10/10.

3/10 - simmering and ready to erupt at any tick of the clock, the shitometer never goes lower than 3/10.

Mahalis 'Are we heading out tonight for a drink'?

Mohamed 'Sorry Mahalis, the Shitometer is roaring'!

by CutUpRough July 29, 2010

spamometer

The feeling you get when approving several new members into a facebook group that allows marketers.

Ok hold on tight. About to approve 70 new requests! Turn on your spamometers!

by MonteBert September 30, 2013

spudometer

A handy-dandy gauge dat tallies up how many potatoes you've harvested, prepared, eaten, etc.

If da Little Red Hen had been baking potatoes instead of bread, her non-helpful colleague-animals would have glanced at their individual spudometer-readouts and found dat they all displayed da exact same humiliating/disappointing tally-figures:

"Number of spuds planted: 0
Number of spuds tended: 0
Number of spuds harvested: 0
Number of spuds prepared: 0
Number of spuds baked: 0"
And lastly, of course {{{drum roll}}} ---
"Number of baked spuds given me to eat: 0"

by QuacksO April 29, 2021

Shitometer

When you have reached your peak of Shit taken.

My shitometer is almost on E.

by ElJefeBoyd October 28, 2022