Dickritos

When a white guy has a big bag of Doritos and a mexican attempts to take some and the white guy proceeds to put the bag in his pants and continues eating them from his pants so the mexican can't and won't get them.

Brown Man: Gimmie some Doritos CJ
Cracker Jack: BITCH HANDS THE FUCK OFF OF MY DICKRITOS

by Spornge Berb May 30, 2018

Pencilius Dickitus

Pencilius Dickitus, also known as pencil dick and Ward Syndrome, is an extremely rare and deadly disease, affecting American and British men. Over one cases were reported in 2007 alone. The infected boy (whom will not be named) had a shaft measuring 4 1/2 inches in length, yet only 3/8 inches in circumference. The head, however, is often average in size, and has been noted to be exceptionally large in over one cases.

Doctor: Im sorry son.
Tommy TwoTones: What is it?
Doctor: You have pencilius dickitus
Tommy: What is it?
Doctor: very bad: your dick resembles a pencil.
Tommy: Is it common to have this?
Doctor: No. You're the first. Haven't you noticed?
Tommy: I thought it was normal...This is so sad.*cries*
Doctor: That's what she said.

by Skyther Gitlow August 15, 2007

Dickjitsu

(Note: Has both Noun and Verb forms)

Noun: The subtle art of being a dick. For when a dick move is performed with such a level of care, cunning, and sheer balls that flak for it is unlikely to fall on its perpetrator. A portmanteau of "dick" and "jujitsu". The term was coined by Erica Cantin in Cracked.com's "The 5 Ballsiest Lies Ever Passed Off as Journalism."

Man 1: Wait, so Ben Franklin reported in an issue of Poor Richard's Almanack that his rival — Titan Leeds — had died, and that he had been replaced with an impostor, who was actually just the real Leeds?
Man 2: Yup.
Man 1: ...and when Leeds really did die, Ben congratulated the "impostor" for owning up the the charade by dying?
Man 2: Yup.
Man 1: Wow, that man was like a black-belt dickjitsu master.

by Astrolounge August 27, 2009

Diaritos

Shitting horribly (diarrhea) after eating an entire bag of Doritos chips.

I shouldn't have stayed up all night playing video games and eating an entire bag of Doritos. Now I have a horrible case of diaritos.

by nightowl21 July 10, 2010

Dickitis

A girl who craves a big penis.

Damn that girl is on him,she must have dickitis!!

by eLeezy April 28, 2009

Dickitis

An illness of needing sex all the time.

Marie isn’t feeling well she has dickitis.

by Rosé96 June 29, 2019

Dicktits

1. The appearance of breasts created by holding one's scrotum tightly against one's penis shaft, so that the testicles appear as the aforementioned breasts, with the head of the penis as the head of a tiny woman. Works best if the penis is both circumcised and shaved. However, a hairy penis and/or ballsack can give the hilarious impression of a busty gorilla.

2. An angry interjection used to express frustration.

3. An insult implying stupidity or annoyance.

1. Person 1: "Hey dude, check out these huge dicktits!"
Person 2: "You're a fag."

2. "Fucking dicktits! I hit my goddamn thumb with this hammer!"

3. "Stop being such a fucking dicktit, you goddamn assmunching cheesedick moron."

by Japhasca July 26, 2011