Anything that is done in the style of a cunt. An item that is offensive, unhelpful, insulting, obstructive or demeaning. Best used in situations where use of the word cuntmay result in harm to oneself, and the subject isn't intelligent enough to understand the implications (see example).
If a manager treats his staff badly he has a 'cuntional' management style, rather than him simply being called a cunt, thus reducing the likelyhood of being sacked.
1. The functionality of a cunt.
2. The functionality of a system if used by a cunt
The functionality of this system is to process customer orders in a timely fashion. If used by John, the cuntionality of this system is to keep John in a job when he should have been fired a long time ago.
After enduring five minutes in the company lunch room with coworkers talking endlessly about their children's fecal accidents and showing photos of their brood, Jennifer suddenly stood up and cuntically said, "Excuse me, I have an appointment at Planned Parenthood."
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
A phenomenon in film/television series, most notably streaming series, where the main premise is drawn out to such a point that it takes an entire season or more to get the parts of the series the audience is actually interested in seeing.
For example, if a series is titled "Surf Dracula," a majority of viewers would tune in expecting to see Dracula surfing by the first or second episode. However, the entire first season would instead be tedious padding and backstory before finally ending with Dracula surfing in the last five minutes of the season finale.
I watched "Smallville" on Netflix the other day. Dude, it was ten seasons of filler before he finally flew! Major Surf Dracula Syndrome!
Finding your way back to the truth by fixing on one verified fact and working out from there, the way you navigate by the North Star when everything around you is spinning.
Rumours were flying everywhere, so she went northstarring — one checked fact at a time.