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Coomey is a king, a strong minded, generous, clean hearted genius.
Coomey can also be dominant and aggressive if necessary. Do not mess with Coomey.
I wish I was a Coomey.
Coomey by Fandio November 23, 2021
Words you can keep
Initially an internet version of the Wojack guy, a Coomer is a male chronic masturbator, an Incel on steroids, who lives in front of his PC consuming porn all day, and having no other interest in life other that to reach his next orgasm.

But the meme has grown, naturally.

Coomer now refers to any young man who is solely concentrated on an almost psychopathic need to chase the next dopamine hit, be it masturbation, game score, high of any kind. Coomers are now utterly useless self-pleasuring addicts, to the exclusion of any future career development or frankly any future plans at all beyond the strict need feed their addictions.
Haven't seen Geoff in ages? Yeah, since he lost his job and his girlfriend, he's locked himself in his room with packs of beer, a pack of toilet roll and Pizza on speed dial. Even skipped his mother's funeral. Total coomer now. Sad.
Coomer by Macnadoodle October 10, 2021
Related Words

Coomers Law 

If you masturbate in an unlocked room, someone is bound to enter.
Person 1: I was masturbating in the office supply closet which no one EVER enters, but of course as soon as I started spanking it, my boss walked in.

Person 2: That's Coomers law. Shouldn't have challenged it.
Coomers Law by TheGodOfSpeechcraft December 6, 2019

Coomer Corner 

The special corner in everyone's room where they go to coom.
Can also be a state of mind.
Wesley: Where's Namit?
Udai: He's probably in his coomer corner.
Coomer Corner by zhewrong February 27, 2021
When you are so drunk, that you pass out at 3:00 in the after noon hugging the porcelin. Usually being Cooney'd involves a foam filled mouth and a face filled with tears. Dry heaving may be a side effect, but that is if and only if you are completly Cooney'd.
Brandon drank a shit ton of Natty Light because we kept making him bong 2-3 beers at a time. He got totally cooney'd and he almost died.
Cooney'd by The Cooney Train April 25, 2010

Butt Coomer

When you coom/cum in a girls anus then leave it their and let her clean it up
I’m such a butt coomer
Butt Coomer by Moondog88 February 17, 2021
The idea that porn is the sole purpose of ones existence and that usually people under this ideology usually tend to beat their dick like David Pelzer gets ragdolled by his mother.
I fucking hate coomerism -Marshall
Coomerism by TrickByTrade December 6, 2020
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Lookie at these bunch of narps, NARP NARP NARP
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