Initially an internet version of the Wojack guy, a Coomer is a male chronic masturbator, an Incel on steroids, who lives in front of his PC consuming porn all day, and having no other interest in life other that to reach his next orgasm.

But the meme has grown, naturally.

Coomer now refers to any young man who is solely concentrated on an almost psychopathic need to chase the next dopamine hit, be it masturbation, game score, high of any kind. Coomers are now utterly useless self-pleasuring addicts, to the exclusion of any future career development or frankly any future plans at all beyond the strict need feed their addictions.
Haven't seen Geoff in ages? Yeah, since he lost his job and his girlfriend, he's locked himself in his room with packs of beer, a pack of toilet roll and Pizza on speed dial. Even skipped his mother's funeral. Total coomer now. Sad.
by Macnadoodle October 10, 2021
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A coomer, (Pronounced COOM-er), is an elusive creature that spends its whole life desperately trying to reach the next best nut. It is classed as a critically endangered species. The coomer was once thought to be nothing but fiction due to the rarity of these beasts.
Not much is known about the habits of these elusive creatures, but they are said to reside in tiny rooms that reek of mildew and B.O., floor littered with custom-made waifu pillows and the coom of the coomer itself. They are said to be mostly solitary, though there have been half a dozen cases of supposed coomer packs being sighted in the wild.
It is said that, if disturbed, the coomer will become enraged, and will attack the offending creature. It has been reported that a coomer may even coom upon its enemies, some say even stuffing them into homemade COOM jars on occasion.
My best friend went missing in 1987 during a hike in a remote area of alaska. The case has never been solved, but researchers say it is likely that he was taken by a wild coomer.
by Emomemeo June 17, 2020
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A man, typically in his 20s, who's sole existence revolves around Cooming.

A Coomer is an expert masturbator.
Joe has spent so many years as a Coomer that his right arm is now freakishly muscular and he cannot think about anything other than his next coom.
by bongdiddler September 4, 2019
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A coomer is someone who excessively mastubates for the dopamine rush and the sense of fullfillment. Usually masturbates up to seven times a day,
by December 10, 2020
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Person who lives or depends on the pleasure of orgasming multiple times a day, generally being a sad degenerate person.
Twitch streamer by the name of Hasanabi is a Coomer, aka 9 /11 Andy or Poo Poo Piker.
by Chief__Keef November 19, 2019
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Coomer is an internet meme based on an illustration of a scraggly male character who is mocked as an excessive masturbator. More broadly, coomer (with a lowercase C) is an often ironic insult for an oversexed young man or, more generally, a loser.
That guy is such a Coomer
by DaBabySussyBalls October 11, 2021
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A lonely guy who thinks, talks and focuses too much about sex. An average coomer masturbates porn almost throughout the whole week and stinks like matches and bleach
by dankm3m3rzz September 23, 2021
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