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Being so mentally deranged and exhausted from years of masturbating to porn that you have turned into an absolute sociopath, plagued by anxiety and loneliness. Your only pleasure in life is ejaculating to porn several times a day. Slang for what a normal man does when they have an orgasm is to cum. What the porn addict does is to COOM.
- Exclaimed the coomer.
by Supreme_blue September 20, 2019
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A coomer, (Pronounced COOM-er), is an elusive creature that spends its whole life desperately trying to reach the next best nut. It is classed as a critically endangered species. The coomer was once thought to be nothing but fiction due to the rarity of these beasts.
Not much is known about the habits of these elusive creatures, but they are said to reside in tiny rooms that reek of mildew and B.O., floor littered with custom-made waifu pillows and the coom of the coomer itself. They are said to be mostly solitary, though there have been half a dozen cases of supposed coomer packs being sighted in the wild.
It is said that, if disturbed, the coomer will become enraged, and will attack the offending creature. It has been reported that a coomer may even coom upon its enemies, some say even stuffing them into homemade COOM jars on occasion.
My best friend went missing in 1987 during a hike in a remote area of alaska. The case has never been solved, but researchers say it is likely that he was taken by a wild coomer.
by Emomemeo June 17, 2020
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A man, typically in his 20s, who's sole existence revolves around Cooming.

A Coomer is an expert masturbator.
Joe has spent so many years as a Coomer that his right arm is now freakishly muscular and he cannot think about anything other than his next coom.
by bongdiddler September 04, 2019
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A variation of the meme doomer. Used to make fun of people obsessed with porn/masturbation. The term first originated on 4chan. Also see coom
Guy 1: Just watched a 4 hour porno and I came 20 times! Man that felt good.

Guy 2: Dude, you’re a fucking coomer.
by nlolhere May 28, 2020
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A name typically seen in the boarda of 4chan. A coomer is someone who is addicted to pornography and masturbation to the point where their whole life is affected by it. Coomers' life orbits around excessive masturbation and often affects their personal relationships.
John: Why didn't you show up at class?

Kyle: I was horny and decided to stay home and jerk off.

John: Damn, did 4chan turn you into a coomer? It will start affecting your grades.
by based freetard September 04, 2020
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Person who lives or depends on the pleasure of orgasming multiple times a day, generally being a sad degenerate person.
Twitch streamer by the name of Hasanabi is a Coomer, aka 9 /11 Andy or Poo Poo Piker.
by Chief__Keef November 18, 2019
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