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Alcoholistic 

The antithesis of Teetotalism; the embrace of alcohol as a life-enriching and enjoyable substance and presence in everyday life. Plays on the words alcoholic and holistic.

Can be used as an adjective (to be Alcoholistic) or a noun (to be an Alcoholistic).
"You're an alcoholic?"
"No, I just enjoy drinking. I'm an Alcoholistic."

"I don't drink or put toxins in my body. I also listen to shitty music."
"Oh yeah? I'm Alcoholistic. It makes it way easier to deal with you."
Alcoholistic by apeirophobia February 1, 2010

Alcoholis Interuptis 

A serious physical and psychological condition arising from a short period of drinking, typically at lunch, followed by a period of not drinking. Symptoms include headache, sleepiness and irritability.
The only known cure is more alcohol.
Billy: I had a couple beers at lunch, and now I have a headache and no buzz.

John: Yeah, I noticed from your bitchy comments and yawns during the staff meeting you were suffering from Alcoholis Interuptis.

alcoholism 

drinking like you're in college when you're no longer actually in college.
It was normal for Joe to drink this much in college, but now he just has alcoholism
alcoholism by katiemac604 February 7, 2010

alcopalsy 

A serious condition occurring when when one consumes too much alcohol which causes temporary paralysis and/or involuntary movements
Everyone realized Patty had alcopalsy when she tried to wink, but she farted instead.

After drinking six Coors Lights, Mom had alcopalsy.
alcopalsy by frontburners March 3, 2016

Alcoholism 

What came out when Poverty had sex with Despair.
Alcoholism is growing up so fast!
Alcoholism by Pelican7 October 29, 2014

Alcoholesbianism 

Drinking so much that the sex of someone does not matter as long as they have lips.
"How was the party?"
"oh kicking, but there was some alcoholesbianism going on, girls making out all over the place"
"sweet as"
Alcoholesbianism by Thomthegreat December 17, 2008