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Florida is a state in the southeastern most part of the US. Its known for its beaches, crime, and smelly old people.

Most people say Florida only has one season, which is ridiculous, for Florida has many seasons! There's tourist, hurricane, swimsuit, rainy, college(aka: Spring break) and snow bird season!

If you're on the gulf, the best time to go to the beach is November. By far the worst time is College season, which seems to be nothing more than all the college's in the country collaborating against us poor locals, sending wave after wave of their craziest 'students' to come tear up our beaches, jam up our roads, and cause a number of drunk-driving accidents over the course of 5-6 weeks.

As for the old people. There are lots of them. There are tons and tons, MASSES. The dominate every aspect of life, most respectable neighborhoods are built to accommodate those them. My neighborhood recreational center? The golf center.

Driving in Florida is not dangerous, its FUN. Stop signs? Who needs them! Turning signals? They're for pussies! And speed limits? PSH! If your 60 or older, you drive at least 20 miles under the speed limit, if your 25 and younger, you drive 20 miles OVER the speed limit, and if you're a tourist you drive however slowly or quickly it takes for you to get that picture of the pelican shitting.

A nice place to live sometimes, but a better place to just visit.
Florida's weather is also extremely bipolar. Just today, it had been ultra-warm and foggy with no sun to be seen like it had been for the last 3 days. Then, while sitting outside for lunch, suddenly the sun came out and all the clouds dissipated at once, lifting the fog and leaving the wind free to make us cold. Now, only 3 hours later, its sunny and chilly.
by florida_babe December 17, 2009
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A state with two seasons... Summer and January 14th.
I went to Florida for Christmas break... It felt like I was there for SPRING Break.
by Ryan DeBrowne February 26, 2005
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The only state in the country where the further north you go, the further south you get. Also a lovely place to retire.
If I retire rich, I will probably live in or around Miami, but if I retire poor, I'll probably retire up North near the panhandle, in a trailor, with my dog Rufus. someone kill me
by SeanH February 18, 2005
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Jello-type fluid which comes out of the anus (Usually when the patient had flu type B)
Dude my underwear is soaked with Flo Rida.
by NameDropper April 12, 2009
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1) A piece of shit who can't write his own music. Specializes in ripping off songs that are actually good and modifying their choruses in the most hideous ways possible, then overlaying them with his shit-ass rhymes.

2) When you accidentally type a space between the O and the R in "Florida" and are overwhelmed with "Oh, shit" when you realize you've just referenced a shitty faux-musician.
Person 1: "You spin my head right round, right round, when you go down, when you go down"
Person 2: Fuck you, you tool. It's "you spin me right round, baby, right round, like a record, baby, right round round round." Jesus fuckin' H. Christ.

Further examples of musical theft: "Blue" - Eiffel 65 = "Sugar" - Flo Rida

Person 1: Where are you going for vacation?
Person 2: Flo rida
Person 2: Shit
Person 2: Sorry man, hit the space bar. FML.
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n. An absolute mess.
v. To ruin things for others, by being an absolute mess.
DeSantis' drunk mistress was florida all over the inauguration party.
His best man was so drunk he florida'd that speech about the groom's sexcapades.
The state of Florida really florida'd another election with another florida of a recount.
by #RogerStone November 15, 2018
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