When a simp commits an act of verbal kindness towards another person in hopes of getting a relationship with that individual. The difference between a simpliment and a compliment is whether or not the Comment said is intended for attracting love from the other individual in the conversation.
Simp: OMG you are cute! Can I have your number?
Girl: ewget away from me you simplimenter
(The astericks (*) mark the similies and similie phrases.)
Your granpa: "Geez whiz you young rascal. When my family went on road trips we didn't have a drive-thru to stop at. Us young whippersnappers had to pack our own ham and cheese sandwiches, then we'd hop in the car with our parents, and *we'd be off like a dirty shirt.*"
Your granma recalling the good times on her deathbed. Sighs, "Your granpa used to *ride me like a stallion.*"
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.