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jerkin' the gherkin

Paul was jerkin' his gherkin to a Britney Spears video.
jerkin' the gherkin by the pope June 11, 2004

jerkin the gherkin 

A term used for male masturbation. Unsure of the background, maybe there are some guys out there with green vinegary penises.
"Brian had enough of MTV, so he turned to Television X for some real porn. Aroused, he began jerkin' the gherkin".

jerkin' the gherkin

Verb. To masturbate. Especially refers to male masturbation. See also spanking the monkey.
Mike said he sprained his wrist by playing the drums, but I know he really did it by jerkin' the gherkin.
jerkin' the gherkin by Grandmaster D November 30, 2006

Jerkin' the gherkin

Slang for the holy practice of masturbating.
(Ted sees Ed's room is a complete shitstorm of messiness)
Ted: "Ed, have you been Jerkin' the Gherkin?"

jerkin the gherkin 

having a wank
jerkin the gherkin by tim123473 February 22, 2009

Jerkin' the Gherkin

Masturbation, typically involving a masturbator with a particularly small penis.
"Dude was jerkin' the gherkin to a picture of Hillary Clinton when I walked in, swear to God."
More from Urban Dictionary

briefcake 

"Did you check out the briefcake in courtroom C?"
briefcake by Ben Frey April 6, 2006
Word of the Day on November 3, 2026
Brought to public attention by Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein in the book on the fall of Richard Nixon, All The President’s Men, ratfucker was Nixon’s term for a political operative who sows chaos among opponents; an agent provocateur. It is thought to have originated among campus political rivalries at USC, and seems to have some usage in the US military.
Along with Nixon’s other ratfuckers, Roger Stone caused fights at otherwise peaceful Democratic Party protests to generate a false narrative that the Democrats were violent and dangerous.
Ratfucker by Ricky Ramjet November 2, 2017
Word of the Day on November 2, 2026

countrypolitan 

Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
Word of the Day on November 1, 2026

Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
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