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ferret fiddling

A practice employed by British South Eastern Farmers for several centuries. The act itself involves stimulating the nether regions of a ferret, so that said ferret can de-stress and continue to ward off evil spirits. Obviously it goes without saying that the farmers didn't mind either.
Daves wife could tell from the wet patch on his lap that he'd been vigourously ferret fiddling, cripes!
ferret fiddling by egnaro May 17, 2005

fiddling a loose one 

when you give someone with whiskey dick a hand job to try to get it up, but of course, they have whiskey dick, so you can't get it up. so the penis just kind of flops around while you fiddle with it. the worst thing that can happen to a drunk and horny individual.
Girl 1: "Man, Casey had whiskey dick, so I was fiddling a loose one for a while"
Girl 2: "Dude that sucks...sorry you didn't get it in!"
fiddling a loose one by theOGfiddler69 September 23, 2017

fiddling while Rome burns 

To occupy oneself with unimportant matters and neglect priorities during a crisis.

Origin: (The source of this phrase is the story that Nero played the fiddle (violin) while Rome Burned during the Great Fire in AD 64).
duskins: "Just waiting for the time to be ideal!"
Zavah: "That time is never going to exist,why are you fiddling while Rome burns?"
duskins: . . . "oh f***." >_<
The art of female masturbation.
I'm fiddling so leave me be!
I really need to fiddle.
Fiddling by indiana princess October 31, 2010

fadiddling 

the act of playing with someones penis, especially in public or when other people are around. not to actually jerk someone off, just playing with it.
"My girl loves fadiddling with my cock"
fadiddling by Special Kay K December 7, 2011

fiddling the ferret 

To masturbate. To stroke one's own penis. To jerk off.
After Sara turned out to be a bitch and he realized Heather was a gold-digging whore, Al stayed home, glumly fiddling the ferret to porn he found on imagefap.
fiddling the ferret by Blenderhead91 September 7, 2010
More from Urban Dictionary

briefcake 

"Did you check out the briefcake in courtroom C?"
briefcake by Ben Frey April 6, 2006
Word of the Day on November 3, 2026
Brought to public attention by Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein in the book on the fall of Richard Nixon, All The President’s Men, ratfucker was Nixon’s term for a political operative who sows chaos among opponents; an agent provocateur. It is thought to have originated among campus political rivalries at USC, and seems to have some usage in the US military.
Along with Nixon’s other ratfuckers, Roger Stone caused fights at otherwise peaceful Democratic Party protests to generate a false narrative that the Democrats were violent and dangerous.
Ratfucker by Ricky Ramjet November 2, 2017
Word of the Day on November 2, 2026

countrypolitan 

Term used to describe someone who is a mix of both rural (country) and urban (metropolitan) lifestyles/upbringings. He/she is typically equally comfortable in both settings and is able to seamlessly slip back and forth between the two, appreciating the characteristics of each.
That ol' gal of mine drives the 12 lane freeway during the week and a John Deere on the weekends. She likes opra and the Grand Ol' Opry. I love them countrypolitan women.
countrypolitan by MOChick November 7, 2006
Word of the Day on November 1, 2026

Witch Bath 

A bath consisting of a variety of slats, oils, soaps or any other added ingredients such as fruits, milks, herbs or any other spices for health or beautifying benifits.
She brought home alot of stuff and took it to the bathroom. She must be taking a witch bath.
Witch Bath by carnieboy30 October 26, 2020
Word of the Day on October 31, 2026

kinktober 

An excuse for people to write porn with different types of kinks throughout the month of October.

Smut Fanfiction
That chick doesn't write often but when she does, its for Kinktober.
kinktober by Kinkiest July 12, 2018
Word of the Day on October 30, 2026

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
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