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horseshoes and handgrenades 

The only time/s that almost actually counts.
Mark: "I almost beat that guy!"
John: "Almost only counts in horseshoes and handgrenades."
Related Words

social handgrenade 

Someone, who when out with friends at a social gathering could ‘go off’ at anytime and cause complete and utter chaos to what was a well conducted evening
Wy did you invite Garner out man? you know he’s a social hand grenade, and I’m meeting that smart bird from work later on, I can’t belive it
social handgrenade by Brian July 9, 2003
When your getting a hand job and you come in her hand.
"she was giving me a handjob and I gave her a handpie."
Handpie by Salty-Siren April 29, 2015

Handgelina Jolie

The hand your often masturbate with, a pun to Angelina Jolie
Forever Alone Guy: Be right back, gonna have a quick meeting with Handgelina Jolie
Handgelina Jolie by MutahMan March 6, 2011

Errin Handie 

A Jewdo fighter who loves cock and Batman and especially Batman's cock.
"Did you see that Errin Handie all over Batman's cock at the 'Dark Knight' premier?"
Errin Handie by Matthew Scoobinstein December 31, 2011
The act of flirting, similar to playing footsie, only in which one secretly touches the hands or arms of another with one's own. Can occur under a dinner table or discretely out in the open.
Have you been playing handsie with me under the dinner table?
Handsie by Sharky79 December 11, 2009